The Tale of Orpheus

Since When Was Zeus a Fashion Critic?

This whole chapter is plain crack

This is a dream right? Theo thought to himself while looking down. He was currently levitating in the middle of the sky, surrounded by tall skyscrapers. It didn't look anything like Florida. It could be Miami he thought. Well it's not the author replied. He slowly looked down and got scared. If he drops, he'll be dead before hitting the ground.
"Hello Theo" Zeus said while flying over to where Theo was.
"Who are you? How do I know what I'm saying?"
"Long story but i'm Zeus, god of the sky. I am here to talk to you about Orpheus."
"You're the guy who can't keep his dick in his pants?"
"No. Not true. I am not here to talk about you. I'm here to talk about Orpheus."
"Whos that"
"What does he go by now? Chenle?"
"Thats not how you pronounce. Its pronounced 'chun-lo' not 'chen-lee'. Say it with me now 'chun-lo."
"Yeah same thing."
"Well actuall-"
"loOK WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT YOU AND HIM."
"Why are you calling him Orpheus? His name is Chenle."
"No his body is Chenle. He is, and always will be, Orpheus, god of musicians."
"Why are my dreams so weird?"
"No darling. This isnt a dream. This is what I like to call sleeping reality . Their is probably a scientific term for it but i dont really care about that. Pretty much, you are sleeping but we are in reality. If one of them looked up, they would see a floating person with a horrible sense of fashion."
"If i knew i was going to be kidnapped in the middle of the night by Zeus i would ve worn something better."
"Whateva. Back to Orpheus. You see fate has a way of putting people together and this time they put you and Orpheus together."
"What? Why? How? Did you do this?"
"Do you actually think I'm smart enough to be fate?"
"I don't know you're the god of the sky."
"Do you know why you've always loved the name Eurydice?"
"Because youre the reincarnation of her and ask the other versions of her. Theyre was Lacy, Nick, that poor guy, Leah, Madlyn."
"But that wasnt me."
"Well, obviously. Reincarnation doesnt care about the body. They put at least 2 people into two reason bodies and fate sends them on their way."
"Am I hallucinating?"
"No of course not. If you were hallucinating," Zeus snapped his fingers and Theo fell about 100 feet. "you wouldn't have felt that. So back to Orpheus. I'm just going to warn you now: do not like Chenle, do not date Chenle, do not fall in love with Chenle, do not marry Chenle. Fate will do very bad things to you and him. It's happened too many times before."
"What do you mean?"
"Well before you were Theo, you were Annabelle, who was bitten by a snake. Before her, Tentacion, before him, Leah, all the way back to Eurydice. Do you know how they all died?"
"Natural causes?"
"No, they were bitten by a snake that only nymphs can see. You are 0.0000009% nymph, you will be able to see it, but it will be blurry. It will kill you, you will be reincarnated, you will fall in love, and the cycle will repeat itself."
"How do you know this will happen? This is all a dream."
"You will remember this. There is a 7% chance that the two of you will not die a horrible death. Ok good bye now."
"Wait-"
But it was too late. Zeus has already snapped his fingers and Theo plummeted down to the hard, hard earth.
I guess this is it Theo thought.
Right before he hit the ground, he felt himself going into the ground.
What the f-
He hit something hard. He was sitting on his bed, cuddled up to Chenle. Chenles soft snores could be heard and Theo giggled of how adorable he looked.
"That was one hell of a dream."