Locked Away

  I’ve locked a dangerous part of me the day I met her. I used to be a ruthless ruler, constantly submitting to my own greed. Everything that posed a threat was destroyed. It was the only way I could expand my kingdom, Nasturtium. Others raided for my riches, making it difficult to trust anyone, and as a king, I shouldn’t show any weakness.

  My inner self would instruct me, uttering words such as, “The only way you can win is to kill. To gain power, you must never show mercy.”

  It was lonely even if there were people following orders, but they were simply machines, obeying my commands without a complaint. A part of me wished they would rebel, but then what would become of my kingdom? I had no heir.

  “Don’t worry about them. You have me. I’ll always be with you until the end,” the inner me muttered. “You don’t need anyone else. They’ll just hinder you and your kingdom will decline.”

  When I would be beaten and bloodied to the core, I would consider surrendering to the enemy, but my inner self reassured me, “I’m here. Don’t give in to such useless people. You want to become strong, correct?”

  I was my own advisor. I didn’t need anyone but myself. However, that changed one day.

  My kingdom was on the brink of war against Hydrangea with constant disputes over our borders. I wanted to move further West near the port cities, but it was their territory. “You want that land don’t you? Ambush the port and take it all for yourself!”

  It was appealing. I even considered taking the whole Hydrangea kingdom, but before I could do so, an offering arrived. A man stood in my throne room with a girl five years younger than me. Her dark hair covered her face as she kept her head bowed low. They told me they didn’t want to fight, and instead would offer me this girl to bear a child and share the port.

  “We don’t need a woman! We only want the port! Refuse!”

  I ignored the voice and stared at the girl. It would be beneficial to have an heir when I’m dead, but will it succeed? “What is your name?” I asked.

  She remained silent.

  Impudent fool!

  “Relax.”

  He was right. I shouldn’t take her actions to heart. She doesn’t know what she’s doing. I stared at the man who had taken her and nodded. “I will take the girl, but you must promise me that half of the profit will go towards my kingdom.”

  “What do you think you’re doing? Are you crazy?”

  The man bowed and left the girl in my care.

  I came up to her, annoyed that her head was still down. “You should address me properly as your king.”

  She didn’t stir.

  I clicked my tongue and took a handful of her dark hair, pulling it so she would look at me. I was caught off guard when finding myself being pulled by her ocean blue eyes, sinking into the deep abyss. I let her go with a slight shove and called for my guards, “Take her to her room.” I watched as he frail figure disappeared from my sight.

  Days passed and the girl never left the room I provided. She refused eating and drinking for two days until my maids personally fed her to gain strength.

  “Do you regret not listening to me?” He grumbled.

  “Oh shut up.” I stood by her doorway after a week of not seeing her and knocked. “Open up.” There was no reply, so I knocked again. “I know you’re in there.”