Eglaf

: (

as a person who suffers from mental
illnesses it pisses me off when people
romanticise about it or even fake having
a mental illness. some people act like it's
a good thing to have a mental illness, some people think it's "cool" or "a trend" to be depressed, fuck. some people even think it's a choice. do y'all think that if depression was a choice i'd have it? what about anxiety? ptsd? bipolar? it's not a choice. it's the fucking opposite of a choice. having anxiety isn't waking up one day and being paranoid about what one person will think of you. it's waking up and fearing to leave your house because you're terrified to judged by others, it's second guessing everything you've ever said, it's laying awake at night over thinking every single fucking thing you've said over the past 3 years, it's thinking about something stupid you said or something someone said to you, non stop. every single fucking day, it's having a panic attack about some tiny thing that happened, it's not talking to someone because they look sketchy or they hate you, it's you being scared to text someone because of what they might think of you just randomly pop up to them.

depression isn't just being sad for one of two days, it's being sad for months on end not knowing why, it's feeling worthless. ITS NOT FUN AND ITS NOT CUTE!! depression sits beside you every single day and waits for they moment you're finally happy and whispers to you and tells you that you're worthless, it makes you feel unworthy of any love from any one, even your parents, your siblings and your best friends. it makes you lose motivation, it makes you cry for no reason, it makes you feel numb, it makes the things you enjoy doing, unenjoyable, it makes you feel like you're no longer real and sometimes you even have to check your pulse to make sure you're still alive, it's so much more than some cute story.

having depression and anxiety is THE WORST feeling ever, it's a living hell, you feel worthless no matter what anyone tells you, you think everyone hates you, that everyone is lying to you. sometimes you even have to ask your friends if they still like you, sometimes you have to tell your friends how much they mean to you because you're scared they'll leave you and one day your brain tells you that you're right, and that your friends don't actually like you and that they will leave you and they only hang out with you because they don't want you to be alone.

stop romanticising these things!

they aren't cute whatsoever, they are terrible things and people take their lives everyday because of mental illnesses.