Angel gave me The Bad Boy

The beginning

"The longer it takes you to realize you can't go back to the past when things were just perfect, the longer it takes you to finally move on."

~ Unknown ~

You know the feeling of blood running down your hands? That's what I feel now.

Blood. All I can see is blood.

My silver razor is lying next to me and my eyes are looking straight at the mirror.

Why did I do that? Why did i made a new mark?

My life is a mess that nobody can fix.

All these scars are releses to my pain.

Once you start there is no coming back. You can't stop.

But only thing you can do is look past it.

Sacrs are my passionate drawings.

Life will come to you one day and make you realize that it was wrong, but when you do couple mistakes it'll drive you back to it.

No turning back. No feelings and no regrets.

Today is the day when I am visiting Lilly again.

Today is her day.

She was an angle. Angle that flew so high in a land that nobody knows of. Her life was all rainbows and unicorns.

I loved her. My angle.

Now. Now she's gone and I'm all alone.

/ Flashback /

" Catch me." Lilly yelled to me. I gave her a smile and cougth her like she said to me.

" You know Lily, if you keep doing it you'll get dizzy. And nobody wants that." " But sisy. One more time please." She gave me puppy dog eyes.

How can I resist those.

" Ok, just one more time and we can go buy some ice cream." " I love you sisy." She gave me a kiss on the cheek and went to her wonder world again.

/ End of flashback /

I can't forget those big brown eyes staring at me that day.

That was the day when all of the things got wrong. Where the devil came on earth.Where she got her wings and flew away from me.That was the day when nobody saw me smile again.

And that day was over a year ago.

'Knock, knock' " Rina are you ok?" I heard my mom call. No mom I'm not. I wanted to say so badly, but since that day I shut down my emotions. " Yeah mom, I'm fine. I just need to finish my make-up and dress up." My bold voice filled the room once again.

I took care of my scars and put eyeliner on my eyelids. Make-up hmm, never been a fan of it. When I see girls walking around school and their faces. They put tons of it on them. And every time I see them I have a need to tell them that this is not a circus, but I don't.

" Here we go." I mumbled to myself. I put my black convers on and made my way downstairs. My mom stood at the bottom of the stairs. " You look beautiful honey." She said and I could see tears in her eyes. That's what I hate the most. I hate seeing my mother cry. It always makes me feel like she misses her so much that she blames me for it. " Mom. Stop crying, I'm sure that Lily wouldn't like that. And today is her day." My sweet voice filed the room for the first time.

She was looking at me with her eyes that poped out when I said that. A little smile was on her face buz sorow took it away so soon.

She looked at me from head to toe. I wasn't dressed up at all. I just grabed random things in my dresser. I wore black tight riped jeans with black shirt and plaid shirt. I put my red hair in strict pony tale and did my make-up.