her fixed up life

Chapter 8

I end up laying on the bed with my feet spreaded out.

Jadia:Excuse me!!

Me when you put your close on come in the guest room, 'cause we need to talk like foreal.

Jaida: Ok,

I was just mad because she had a attitude with me and ,I thought that if she had this attitude with me then they will keep going on and on and when mom comes she gone beat the black off of me and all this going happen over again,then we start.fighting and it gets to the point where she ticks off throws the ring act me and leaves and she can't leave because I really need her and love her,etc.

I get in the guest room and sit at my desk I really just fell like crying because for ( 1-I know that she is mad and won't talk to me.2) (I know that when momma comes and ,I come to say hey and kiss Jadia she will back away.)(Them momma would come and beat the mess off me I sit their with my head down  and to myself I recite the Letter that I had wrote her,but she did not write back .
I start saying things t that I really feel.like this. "No matter what happens, you remain my number one. Could you please forgive me for what I have done"I have more issues then I could possibly count. And on my worse days, I'll go from happy to sad in seconds. I won't always like myself, and sometimes I'll even assume you don't like me either. I'll push you away and I might even drive you insane. But I promise you this, nobody could ever even think about loving you as much as I do.

She finally comes in and sit on the bed and listen to what I am talking about.
I end up crying and whimpering.I am still talking because honestly I didn't hear her walk in.
I keep talking and crying and I look up to see that Jadia it's too crying, she is sitting on the bed bent over with her hands cuffed and her face in her hands crying.
I walk over to Jadia and get on my 2 knees and start to truly apologize.

Me: Baby,I am so,so sorry for this I did not want this tho happen.I did not mean to grab you,push you on the ground,and yell/Fuss at you and then call you a name  .I am truly sorry.
I don't know why, I made you cry I'm sorry sweetheart and yet Though you shouldn't be lenient with me I hope you'll forgive
and forget.
I don't know how do I say the words, 'I'm sorry' when I know that words are not enough? And how can I ask you to forgive me when I know I can't forgive myself?
But the thing is I'm not perfect, I make mistakes, I hurt people. But when I say sorry, I mean it. do.
I love how I feel when I look into your eyes, I see the universe in them, nobody and nothing matters when we are together.
You always support me when I am upset and always laugh at my foolish jokes, you love me without  changing me ,I appreciate it.
I love that I can enjoy simple things with you, the sun and your kisses make me happy.

Jadia: Baby,I felt ashamed for what I had done. I don't have any excuses. I did what I did. I take full responsibility for myself and my actions. I wouldn't pawn this off on anybody. I'm sorry it happened. And I hurt people.I love the way you look at me, I adore every wrinkle on your face, you are the man, with whom I wanna grow old
You make me feel like I’m the only girl in the world, you are able to see the beauty everywhere you are the person, with whom I can dance under the rain, when we are together, all problems disappear
I like that I feel confident in our future with you, I see you as a perfect husband for me.And I have long been waiting for a man, who will be my support and protection, with whom I will feel equally comfortable while listening to the music of the surf on the coast, and dancing in the rain. This man for me is you, I love you.

Me:I love you to.I love you so and I and do sorry for what O did.I just sometimes just kind of ,like it my way. But I Have that I have  to give you a chance to do what you want to do.Now can I get a redo?

Jadia:Yes I would love one.

I start to recite the Letter that I had written her.

Me:No matter what happens, you remain my number one. Could you please forgive me for what I have done"I have more issues then I could possibly count. And on my worse days, I'll go from happy to sad in seconds. I won't always like myself, and sometimes I'll even assume you don't like me either. I'll push you away and I might even drive you insane. But I promise you this, nobody could ever even think about loving you as much as I do.