Knowing Things Only She Knows: Catherine's Summer Adventure

Chapter 2

16 May, 5:45 p.m. Chula Vista, California

Dear Diary,

          Today is the worst day of my junior year. Worse than the time that Alex stained my favourite dress, and worse than the time that I knew that Mr. McGowan failed my midterm grade because he hate(s)d me. Today, I don’t know if I will see my mother again.

          She has a heart disease, and this is her second confinement in the hospital. I’m afraid that we might loss her, but please sweet Jesus not now. I need my mother so badly. I want her to be by my side as she, dad and I spend our summer in our house in Alabama. I want to travel in Asia with her and dad. I want . . . . . I need her to be alive because of many things. And you know what? This is the first time that I felt myself crying again. I don’t want to lose her. She’s the only one who understands me. I know dad understands me but there’s a difference between the two. I love her so much. She’s the one who raised me and loves me in every beat of her heart. I feel bad for her because of this. She’s a good wife, mother, daughter, niece and boss. Everybody loves her because she is who she is. No one underestimates her because she can’t be tamed. I love her. I love her. I love her. I love her! What will happen to me when she dies? What will happen to our family when she dies? Dad is strong, but to lose one of your strength? That could definitely make you weak. I saw him before, sad and losing hope, when mom was first confined. The both of us were dull and lifeless, and when mom woke up, she laughed at us and said “The two of you are the same”. I don’t want to see her jade-green eyes close, and to hear no more her sweet lullabies and her singing Andrew Lloyd Webbers’ Requiem. Not this time. Not. This. Time.

          Tonight, daddy’s men will fetch me to take me to the hospital in Los Angeles. Can you just stay on my bag? Alex, Elle, Jillian and Travis are worried for me now, but I just told them a lie: “I’m okay”. I don’t want them to worry about me. Besides, finals exam is next week, so I don’t want to disturb them from reviewing. What will I do now?

 

Xoxo,

C.M.S.R.H.

By 6:30, we were already preparing to leave. Daddy’s men were already there, waiting for me. Before I went outside, I felt a hand grabbing my shoulders.

“Catherine, wait,” I heard Ms. Kathleen say. Like everybody there, they were wearing their pajamas and nightgowns, but Ms. Kathleen is very different. I thought for a second, about my teacher who looks a little bit scary during class but actually looks like a hottie in night.

“Cathy, I want you to be strong with whatever you’ll see there,” she said, sounding like mom whenever I’ll tell her how pissed I am to the gossips that my classmates spread. Mommy will sit beside my bed and will brush my hair softly, then she’ll whisper in my ear, “They don’t need to know what you know”, like what my father always tells me.

“Prepare yourself also, because what you will see there will be either something that you like or something that you want so badly to not to come true. It’s better for you to be ready, you know? Besides, I know you’re a strong girl and you can overcome this,” she continued, sounding so sure. Ms. Kathleen sounded so sure, like everything’s going to be okay again.

“What if things go wrong? What will I do?” I asked. I needed that question to be answered so badly, and I know Ms. Kathleen is the only one who can answer it. She thought for a second then tugged a strand of hair in my ears. She’s like mom.

“Return here and we will talk about it. I won’t interfere, don’t worry. You’ll just tell me what you are feeling”.

“Like a treatment?”