Cats with Guns

Martin's Bar

The skies turned orange as the sun slowly lowered itself, like it was slowly falling into bed after being beat by his father for the third time today. With a broom. Martin's Bar, the city's favorite place to get milk, sat in it's regular corner spot next to where that old homeless guy got mugged. Jeffery Carlos, a tabby cat, walked into the bar. A couple heads turned, then quickly turned back to their glasses of milky milk. Jeffery was known for being a nasty gun slinger. The guns he slinged were nasty. Gross, ew.
Jeffery walked to the counter. "Hey Martin," he says in his deep rough voice, "One glass of malk please."
Martin, who was a ginger cat, replied. "I only serve milk here," He says in his supa dupa high pitched voice. "We have malk at our other establishments. We have malk and molk at the one on Pee Pee Street."
"Oof," Jeff mumbled, "Ill go there, then." He turned to leave, but then the person he's been trying to avoid showed up. His ex-boyfriend, Tony Ericson, a Bengal cat, walked in. Tony glared at his ex-boyfriend, Jeffery Carlos.
"Oh," Tony mumbles "Hi, Jeff..." he kicks a empty wine bottle towards a wall, shattering it. Jeffery decided not to look at Tony's dumb, stupid, sexy eyes. Stupid, boner creating pupils. 
"Oh yeah," Tony starts again. "I brought my new boyfriend." He gestured towards the door, where a big, fucking huge black cat walked in, followed by two smaller, skinnier cats. The type of cats of these two are unimportant. 
"So, ur Ton-E's eggs???" the big boi cat asked. He glared at Jeffery with his big, piss colored eyes. "He told me wut u did to him!!!! U ABUZ HIMMMMSSS!!!!!!!"  Big boi cat yanked a revolver out his pocket. "Say good bis, LOSER!!"
In an instant, Jeffery ninja rolled under a table and reached out his pistol. The other cats in the bar duck under tables and jump behind the counter. A nasty gun fight was gonna go down. The two tiny cats whip out their guns of unimportant types. POW POW!! BLAM BLAM!! GEET GEET!! TOOT TOOT!! AH AH!! YEET YEET! POO POO!! PEE PEE!!  Jeffery had pushed the table over as a distraction. As the cats were distracted and shooting at the toppled table, Jeffery shot at the retarded cats in three shots. The fat cat tripped over and starded bleeding out. His final, dying words were "Fuk, mi!" and died. 
Tony, the fucking weirdo had a boner and rubbed his nibbles. "Oh, yeah!" he moaned "I love the way they bleed out! Oooohhh..." 
Jeffery looked at his ex "What the fuck."
Tony turned his attention from the corpses to Jeffery. "Oh, I invited them over so at least one cat would die," he said, "But three, oh my god, I'm drooling..." 
Jeffery has had enough of his ex moaning because of his fucking weird, gross kink. "I've had enough of this," he says "See ya, weirdo," He starded towards the door, when Martin stopped him.
" Jeffery!!" he screamed, "You better pay for this!"
Jeffery said "Fuck you," and left.