Vanitas x Female! Reader ☆ Pure Shores ☆

19. In The Arms Of The Ocean

“I think it’s time.”
Vanitas sighed, turning from his place at the window to regard (Y/N) with a heavy expression.
(Y/N) halted, the grip on the pestle she was holding tightened.
There was a long, agonising pause.
 “Are you sure?”
Vanitas gave one reluctant nod.
(Y/N)’s eyes slid shut, her head dropping down for a moment, as she took a deep steadying breath.
She looked up, back at Vanitas.
“I guess we better head out then.”
She set down the pestle, rounding the counter to pluck her overcoat from the rack beside the door, before handing Vanitas his.
The pair were silent, avoiding one another’s eyes as they stepped out into the street.
They turned to head down the long dirt road, as the street lights that illuminated the way flickered on one by one.
Dusk had fallen, and night was chasing close behind.
They walked side by side, the silence maddening, as they both tried in vain to ignore all the thoughts and feelings that it didn’t even seem possible to bring into being.
Reluctantly, and with a shaking hand, Vanitas reached out, interlocking their fingers with a feather-light tenderness.
(Y/N) looked down in surprise, before looking up to meet his needy gaze, his shining citrine eyes conveying all the meaning behind this simple gesture.
I need you to do this with me.
(Y/N) searched the horizon before her, desperately wondering what she could possibly say that would convey all of the emotions swirling inside of her like a storm.
As they crested a small hill, the sea came into view before them, spreading like ink across the land, and she knew, there was simply not enough time.
(Y/N) always loved the sea, felt comforted by it, drawn to it – but now, it only sickened her, a defiler of dreams and a destroyer of hope.
She cursed it, the Leviathai, and the Manarrii herself.
The dirt road forked at its end, one leading left to the harbour, the other descending into a carpet of sand, ending in a barrier of craggy rocks that separated it from the beach.
Hand in hand, they clambered over the rocks, coming to stand at the top of the beach, like they were finding themselves lost and without purpose.
Vanitas turned to (Y/N). “Now we wait.” His voice was quiet, subdued. “Sora and the others won’t be far with…” he trailed off, perhaps deciding it was unnecessary to say more.
(Y/N) nodded, turning to brush sand off a nearby stone.
“We should sit.”
Vanitas glanced around himself, as if deciding where to sit, before he perched beside her on the small rock, their room limited.
“It’s cold...we should share heat.”
(Y/N) couldn’t help the wry smile blooming across her face, which Vanitas mirrored, a faint dusting of red across his cheeks.
For a flicker of a second, the world melted away, his impending departure and her subsequent heartbreak worlds away, happening to two other people in another lifetime.
And like that, the moment was gone.
Silence fell again, broken only by the wheeling of birds overhead, the crashing of the waves, the horn of a boat pulling into harbour some distance away.
“Hey,”
(Y/N) turned to Vanitas.
“Did I….ever thank you for saving my life? I mean, properly?”
(Y/N) blinked back at him in surprise, before dropping her gaze in momentary thought.
She grinned.
“Not with those exact words….”
Vanitas smirked. “I get it, I was a huge Naafak.”
“Yeah, you kinda were.”
Vanitas nudged her with his shoulder, but he was still smiling.
Then, his face dropped, his eyes becoming serious and intense.
He looked away, uncomfortable, uncharacteristically afraid.
“Seriously though…I can’t ever repay you for what you did.”
(Y/N) swallowed back the burning in her throat.
“I know it was foolish but-“
“It wasn’t.” Vanitas interjected firmly. “Forget what I said before.”
(Y/N) nodded, before giving him a watery smile.
She remembered how it seemed like all the air had been driven from her body, and the world around her had seemed to melt away the first time she saw his face.
Looking at him now, she knew that the  feeling had never gone away.
“I couldn’t let you die.”
Vanitas searched her eyes in the growing darkness, his lips drawing in to a tight line.
“I understand that now.”
Their heads inclined towards one another, the moment heated by wanton looks and unsaid feelings.  
“Vanitas, I…”
A loud, piercing whistle cut above them, far out into the crashing waves.
They turned, eyes searching into the distance for the source of the sound, before a shock of brown hair burst from the water, followed close behind by glinting silver.
(Y/N) watched as a huge smile broke across Vanitas’s features, as his whole body sagged with relief.
Her eyes filled with tears despite her sadness, so overjoyed for him that he would regain everything he had lost over these past few weeks.
With two fingers, Vanitas gave two sharp and short whistles of his own in response, before waving an arm above his head.
As his brother and Riku swam towards the shore, he turned to face (Y/N) with a sad smile, before his eyes flicked to a spot over her shoulder, his expression turning sardonic.
“Right on time.”
(Y/N) turned with a confused frown, bringing up a hand to shield it from the assaulting winds.
There, stood some respectable distance up the beach with his hands stuffed awkwardly in his pockets, was Ventus.
“I don’t understand.” (Y/N) said, her expression dismayed as she glanced back to Vanitas, then to Ventus again.
Wordlessly, Vanitas shook his head, before reaching up to cup her cheek.
Sighing, (Y/N) covered it with her own hand, another resting on his forearm.
Her eyes slid shut as she leaned in to him hungrily, wanting to burn every part of this gesture within her soul, in hopes that she would always remember the warmth of his touch, the smell of his skin.
After a moment, she met his eyes, which were half-lidded as they looked down at her, filled with sadness and loss.
"Still…you could always come with me?” he asked, his voice gently pleading.
(Y/N) looked back at Ventus, her hands still clutching Vanitas.
Ventus gave her a soft, shy smile, nodding once at her.
Ventus, her oldest friend.
She searched the distance behind Ventus, the road leading back to where they came, the dim glow of the lights from the small village beyond, street lights twinkling like stars.
She pictured her home, filled with the ghosts of her past, the mementoes of the life she had lived, the people who had shaped her.
Was she strong enough to leave it all behind?
She turned back to Vanitas, bringing his hand back up to her face, gently pressing her cheek against it as her eyes filled with tears.
“I can’t Vanitas.” her voice shook, barely above a whisper.
She laughed, a rush of air that wavered with sadness and poorly restrained tears.
“I just can’t…”
Vanitas pulled her to his chest, his arms wrapping around her body, his head resting on the top of hers.
 In their embrace, she could feel him shaking just as much as she.
She held on tight, her fingers wrapped into his shirt, forehead pressed against his chest.
There would never be enough time for her to feel satisfied, not when she had to let him go.
“I’ll never see you again.”
Another loud whistle cut through the air, much closer this time, startling the pair out of their tiny world.
They pulled apart, Vanitas’s arms still circling her shoulders.
Sora waved again, much closer to the shore line.
They were out of time.
“(Y/N)…”
Their eyes met again.
“You’ll always have me.” he tucked a stray piece of hair behind her ear. “And no matter what lifetime we exist in, I know that when the time comes, you’ll find me.”
Then he stepped away, and like that their contact was severed.
“Goodbye, (Y/N).”
Her hand drifted uselessly in the space between them, as he literally slipped from her fingers.
He headed off down towards the shore, closer and closer to his brother and his old life, and further and further away from
(Y/N).
A hand rested lightly on her shoulder, startling her.
Looking up, she saw Ventus stood beside her, gasping as she took in his many wounds and bruises.
His lips quirked up in a sad smile as he shook his head, signalling that now wasn’t the time for questions.
They stood looking down the beach together, (Y/N)’s hand reaching up to cover Ventus’s, leaning on him for support.
Vanitas greeted Sora warmly, the brotherly love between them stronger than ever.
Wading into the surf, Vanitas took a small bottle from Sora, popping the lid off impatiently.
He brought the bottle to his lips, and (Y/N) held her breath.
He paused, turning to look back up the beach towards her, his expression torn.
(Y/N) nodded once, her smile weak as her eyes filled with fresh tears.
He smiled back, saying something aloud, but the wind took his words.
“What?”
From the corner of her eye, she saw Ventus peer down at her confused, but (Y/N) was frozen to the spot as Vanitas tipped back his head, downing the antidote in one movement.
In a flash, he dived under the waves, disappearing from view, whilst Sora and Riku watched closely.
For a moment, it seemed like even the wind held its breath.
A burst of water, and a flash of bright, shining red in the orange glow of dusk.
Beside her, Ventus drew in his own breath in awe, whilst (Y/N) couldn’t find it in her to react.
So beautiful.
A shock of inky hair resurfaced, sharing a triumphant, joyous grin with the other Leviathai.
(Y/N) felt her heart swell with joy, touched by the intimate reunion taking place before her, the majesty of the situation.
He had returned to his rightful place.
He was home.
There was another split second, a brief moment, when their eyes met once more, and it was as if time itself had slowed down.
And then, like he had never been, he was gone.
“….Vanitas?” she breathed aloud, her shoulders heaving.
“(Y/N)…” Ventus began.
Abruptly, she pushed out of his grasp, racing down the beach.
She stumbled over the uneven surface of the sand, landing heavily, but she was up again, desperately running.
The biting cold of the sea went unnoticed as she met the waves, her shoes soaked, her skirts weighed down.
“Vanitas!”
She called out, shouting to be heard over the wind, the crashing waves, and the pounding of her heart in her ears.
(Y/N)!” Ventus was by her side again, pulling gently at her arm.
“No! Get off me Ventus.” She snapped, pushing at him. “Vanitas!”  
Ventus gripped her harder, spinning her to look at him.
“Stop it, (Y/N)!”
“I can’t Ven! I can’t I..” she stared up into Ventus’s bright blue eyes, her expression distraught.
“He’s gone. He’s gone…”
Ventus pulled her into a hug, stroking her hair as her body shook with sobs.
“I’m sorry (Y/N), I’m so sorry.”
“He’s gone!”
Ventus gripped her tighter, his own body shaking with the weight of her anguish.
What else could he say except....
"I'm sorry..."