More than Big Boned

21. I'm Not Just Chubby

After leaving Bailey's, I head to the shops to buy ingredients that I need for pasta carbonara. I get some lemonade ice-blocks, pay for everything and leave. I drive home and prepare the meal then get changed into a beautiful navy blue dress. I text Eddie telling him to meet me outside the toilet block at the park in half an hour. Then, at six o'clock, I drive off.

Setting up the picnic for Eddie and I takes my mind off Bailey. My mind keeps wandering back to my first date with Eddie and how we sat there and spoke for hours, eating and enjoying the fresh air. I remember how he kissed me. That was my first kiss.

I finished setting up everything we need for the picnic. I tried to create a replica of our first night; I even got us sporks. I make my way towards the toilet blocks. There aren't many children in the park at this time of night. There aren't many people at all. I hear a motorbike go past and immediately turn my head, thinking it might be Eddie. I can't find the motorbike anywhere so I continue towards the toilet blocks. When I get there, Eddie is waiting for me. His hair shines in the light of the streetlamps. I feel my heart beating faster with each step I take that brings me closer to Eddie.

"Eddie," I say.

His face lights up when he sees me. A big grin spreads across his face. He walks over to me, his strong arms outstretched. I run into them. Eddie runs his fingers through my hair.

"Martina," Eddie rests his head on my head. "I've missed you."

"I've missed you, too," I say. Eddie lets me go and takes my hand. I smile up at him.

"Where are we going tonight?" Eddie asks me.

"Somewhere," I say vaguely.

"Let's go then," Eddie says. I lead him back to the tree where I set the picnic up. I'm really hoping that Eddie likes it much more than I'm hoping nothing is stolen. When we arrive, Eddie laughs. He grabs my face and kisses my forehead.

"This is just like our first date," he says.

I look up at him, taking in his face. The few freckles that dot across his nose and cheeks, his hazel eyes and his long eyelashes, his nose, his mouth, everything. He is truly beautiful. I grab his hand and sit down on the blanket, taking him with me.

"So, I brought you something," Eddie says. "Close your eyes."

I do as I'm told and I hold out my hands. I feel something large and rectangular in my hands. I'm desperate to open my eyes but I wait for Eddie to tell me so.

"What do you think it is?" he asks instead.

"I don't know," I laugh, furrowing my eyebrows. "It could be a box with stuff in it? Is it a box of food? I brought food already."

"Nope, not that," he chuckles.

"I give up. It's too hard," I complain.

"How about you feel it?" Eddie suggests.

I hesitate. "OK..." I hold the item with one hand and feel around with the other. "Oh! It's a book!"

"Yes!" Eddie cheers. "Open your eyes now."

I open them and look at the book. I read the title. "One of Us is Lying by Karen M. McManus. Wait... weren't you telling me that I would really like this book one day?"

"Right on, Martina,"

We sit for a while, talking and laughing until I get out the pasta carbonara and sporks and we start eating.

"Martina," Eddie says in wonder, "you didn't have to make it exactly like our first date."

"It was really special to me, though," I say.

"So, is this you softening me up for rejection?" Eddie jokes.

I laugh. "Anything but that." Putting down my pasta, I stand up, straightening out my dress. I go to sit back down but Eddie stands as well.

Eddie pauses and looks at me, mouth slightly agape. "What - wait. Does that mean...?"

"Eddie, I love your smile and how you can light up any room you walk into. I love how you say my name. I love your laugh, your humour, your face, the fact that we can talk about absolutely anything. You accept me for who I am, Eddie, and that makes me feel special. You always find happiness in -"

Eddie smashes his lips onto mine, stopping me mid-sentence. We didn't even get to the ice-blocks and he's already kissing me. He puts a hand on my waist, pulling me closer. His other hand is on my neck. I run my hands through Eddie's hair. I slide my hand down his shoulder and to the bottom of his shirt. I slip my hand under: I can feel his abs. I take my hand out, feeling too bold. Eddie plays with my hair until I release my lips from his, breathless.

"We didn't get to the ice-blocks," I say, giggling.

Eddie grins. "I don't think it matters. I love you, Martina. You are so great. Every time I see you I just fall in love with you all over again. You're so beautiful, smart, kind, talented. I love you, Martina. No other words can describe how I feel about you."

"I love you, too, Eddie," I say, planting a kiss on his lips. I sit down in Eddie's lap while he's leaning against the tree. Eddie wraps his hands around my waist. My heart fills with joy and I smile to myself.

"So, I guess it's time to pop the question," Eddie states.

"What?" I blurt, alarmed, turning my head to look back at Eddie.

Eddie chuckles. "Will you, Martina Wells..."

"Eddie, I think it's too soon -"

"...be my girlfriend?"

The nerve of that boy! I let out a breathy laugh. "Yes! A thousand times yes!"

We laugh at that for a while and then I turn around and kiss him again.

For so long, I have thought I am incapable of being loved and cared for by anyone other than my family. Eddie proved me wrong. I've been through my hardships; losing Paris and Tiffany, Bianca and her friends bullying me, Thomas keeping secrets, and finally, Bailey and Eddie. At times, I couldn't decide who I liked better out of the two. Other times, I would have my heart set on one of them. All those times I thought Bailey was the one, I was so wrong. Eddie is the one for me.

I've always thought that I'm just chubby. But I'm not just chubby. No. I'm much, much more than that.