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Naruto pov

Hey shikamaru can I talk to, sure.
I waited for shikamaru to follow me and then when we were alone I told him.

Shikamaru ever since we were in the academy I fell in love with u and now that we're 17 I wanted to confess my feeling to you,  so, I love you shika and I really hope you return my feelings.

I'm sorry  naruto but I can't be with you, I'm the clan leader's son so I must find a wife an produce an heir to lead after me, he said.

All I could do was stand there looking at him and crying.
As I told him in a broken crying voice,  I-it's okay but all I ask for is one day of your love and attention and I will never burden you with my presence again okay, I asked.

He said,  okay I will this once just so I wouldn't feel guilty, after all you did help save me from death in the war.

And just like that we spent our day together even though I acted happy on the outside on the inside I was crying with hurt and sadness of knowing that this happiness I feel now would be gone by the end of the night.

And when night reached we were drunk and ended up making love and that was the night I lost my first of everything, my first kiss, my virginity and my first love.

When I woke up the next morning I noticed that shikamaru was not beside me,  and I suddenly remembered the previous day and I started to cry softly,  I cried a broken, hurt and desperate cry. 
I cried for about two hours straight,  and then I got over it a decide that I would keep my promise and I would burden shikamaru with my presence.

After about two months of not seeing him, I then suddenly heard that he was dating in and they were engaged to be married, I felt so heartbroken and depressed, a voice inside my head told me that it would be okay.

The third month rolled by and I found out from my prisoner aka Kurama known as kyuubi no youkai that I was pregnant.
I was shocked at first, then I got excited, I even thought about telling shikamaru I was pregnant,  but then I remembered my promise to him.

I thought things through with the help of karma,  he told me that he would have to change my body structure for me to be able to successfully give birth to my baby.
I decide to stop being a ninja and ended my dream of becoming  hokage.
I went to tsunade and told her to take my name off of the active ninja list and that I was quitting on being a ninja and becoming hokage.
She asked my why in a loud but sad voice and I just told he that I was tired of being a ninja.
She only said okay.

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