Chapter Four: Kasey
‘Kasey!’ Mum called up the stairs. ‘Its time for supper!’
‘Coming mum!’ I called. I closed my suitcase when I spotted a cardboard box beneath one of the suitcase flaps. ‘And what’s inside you?’ I said, not recalling bringing it up. I picked the box up – it was quite heavy – and placed it on my bed and opened it. I felt myself freeze. Staring back at me was a laughing Lucas with his arms around a tubby boy who was using his long, dark, bushy hair as a moustache. It took me a moment to realise that the boy was actually a girl. Me. Oh..my...God.
How on earth did this end up here?
I put down the cardboard lid and then examined the side of the box and spotted my name scrawled in bold caps with a black marker pen, with a smiley face at the end. That was definitely my mum’s writing. Ever since dad won the lottery, she did this thing where she’ll add a smiley face at the end of all her notes. She’s a happy woman, bless her.
Hesitating, I turned the photograph over and scribbled on the back was, “a day to remember 03/05/2000”. But I hadn’t remembered it till now. Looking back, it was a great day. Lucas and I were imitating an annoying thick-moustached supply teacher who had confiscated his phone and my sweets and so we were taking the mick out of him. I made a moustache with my hair and then prank-called Lucas’s phone, which the supply teacher still had. My upper lip was still balancing my moustache, in a sticking-out arched position, so my words came out like grunts and we both burst out laughing and the teacher realised it was us and threatened to give us detention. But we were laughing so much to care which was when Lucas took the photo. That was a good memory...
But I had blocked out all the good memories and focused on the bad. I had to use it as motivation to sort myself out and become a stronger person, emotionally and pyhsically.
I looked through the box to find it contained many more blasts from the past that I so wanted to erase from my memory. But how could I when they acted as a memory? The box was full of so many more photographs from my childhood, some good, some bad, some funny, some painful and some downright embarrassing. There were more photos of me and Lucas, all which caused a a stab in the gut, and even a few essays which I had gotten As at. My former school tie with its red-yellow-and silver stripes and the t-shirt were stashed in the box and I picked up the t-shirt, which fell to my knees now, when I spotted it. The book. That book with the familiar clefs and musical note symbols sketched all over the front and back. My old song lyric book. Letting the t-shirt back slide out of my grip and back into the box, I picked up the songbook. It was heavier than I remembered, full of memories... I had no idea how it got there. I clearly remember throwing it in the bin after that day but someone must have taken it out… mum. Hesitating again, I turned it over and then slowly turned the pages, my heart thudding with every turn, till I found the page I was looking for. And there it was:
Song 15 #Best Friend.
Once upon a time it was me and you
Taking on the world, like we had a clue
Friends forever, yes that was true.
But then things changed.
I’m falling for you
But I’m keeping quiet and you have no clue
I think, I think, I may just love you
More than a friend
But what do I do?
I snapped the book shut, not wanting to read anymore, and breathed out heavily. What is wrong with me? Why am I doing this to myself? That was all in the past. I have to learn to move on. I wiped my eyes, feeling them sting when I heard the turn of my doorknob.
