Guns and Roses [ON HOLD]

A Not-so-Quick Note from the Underrated Twin

Don't listen to anything Ella says; she's a stone-cold bitch.

And I mean that in the nicest way possible.

Assuming that she's already (mis)informed you of my fondness for flowers and a certain boy named Isaac (which is a deadly combination, I'll admit), I won't bother with my version of the story. At least not yet.

I just hope that you don't hate me by the time it culminates. I already hate myself, and I'm fairly certain that Isaac hates me too (even from his grave), which is probably the only thing he and I have in common.

At Isaac's funeral, which was approximately two weeks after his death, the pastor was saying some crap about how life is temporary, that we were made instead for eternity, shit about the glories of heaven and, get this, that Isaac was in "a better place."

I could've sworn I heard Ella snort next to me. I don't blame her. If anything, there was a special place in hell reserved just for Isaac Nakahara. That funeral didn't do Isaac justice, not one bit. I didn't even stay for the burial.

I might've stayed if the sermon wasn't so full of shit. The pastor (who couldn't have been more than twenty-six years old) was clearly a fundamentalist. So why was he lying to 150 people, lying to himself, lying to God (if there is a God)?

Maybe he did it to be nice (doubt it), or he was being politically correct, or maybe because he's a spineless pussy who sold out for 30 shekels of silver. If he was true to his beliefs, he would have titled the sermon: "Isaac Nakahara Is Now Royally Fucked, Make Sure It Doesn't Happen to You" or something like that (I'd be OK with replacing "fucked"). That could have been useful to us heathens in attendance. Instead, he joins a long list of liars. And he's going to hell for it.

There's another reason I left before the sermon ended, and the catered dinner started. ("Too bad about Isaac. Now, please, pass the macaroni.")

Ella joined me seconds after I was out of the church, analysing me, making silent calculations, solving me like I was a math problem and she was fucking Einstein. I glared at her. She smiled astutely.

"Where's Isaac?" she probed, evident pride to her tone for making this realisation. I knew she would find out sooner or later, but I was hoping it would be later. If I'm being honest, I wanted to do this alone, without her tagging along.

I gave her my most menacing look. She couldn't tell anyone about this. She rolled her eyes at me, still smiling.

"Let's go," I said. And together we hightailed it out of that dump. Isaac told me to meet him at the cemetery (which was one shitty place to meet at on the day of your funeral, but I refrained from giving him my opinion).

Ella wasn't as surprised as I thought she would be. It was almost as if she'd predicted this all, and was simply watching the events unfold the way she knew they would. I often considered if she knew more than I did. I wasn't sure why Isaac had even requested that we meet on the day of his funeral. He said something about making a final stand, leaving his legacy.

I had no idea what the fuck he was talking about.

We soon arrived at the cemetery. It was mostly empty, except for a dark figure, barely seen through the mist. I nodded at Ella, and we slowly approached the figure. The closer we got the clearer his outline became, and I noticed he held something in his hand. I moved my feet a bit faster. When we finally neared him, the mist could no longer obscure our vision. What we saw was clear as day. Ella and I watched as Isaac turned around, clutching, in one hand, a rose, and in the other, a gun.

I'll admit my heart fluttered for a moment when I saw the rose. It looked so perfect. Isaac and a rose. Beast and beauty.

Wet dew from the mist lay on the rich red petals, magnifying their glorious colour tenfold. The vibrant green stem flawlessly flowed into the bottom of the rose, connecting the gently curving bottom to the beautiful top. Thin, veined leaves appeared at the perfect intervals from the stem. It looked so perfect. It was thin and pretty and it was in Isaac's hands and it was just so fucking perfect.

I was so focused on the rose, I'd completely forgotten about the gun. The gun.

I never saw a real gun before. I felt the butterflies fluttering in my stomach get shot, one by one, and it suddenly felt so agonising for me to stand. Black spots clouded my vision as my breath hitched. Next to me, Ella stayed calm. I swear I felt as though she wasn't human. Or maybe I wasn't human. Ella looked so unimpressed, like she was watching a movie for the second time. It scared me how composed she was.

We stood a fair few feet away from Isaac. I watched as he smiled, a smile that could only be associated with the devil. I cringed. He slowly approached us, twirling the rose. For a moment I thought he was going to hand it to me. He was so close to us. I didn't notice that I was holding my breath. He glanced between us, then lifted the rose a bit. It tickled Ella's chin as he continued to twirl it. Ella didn't even flinch. This only seemed to broaden Isaac's diabolical grin.

He stopped twirling the rose. "For you, Ella," he said, as he took a step back and extended the rose.

My jaw dropped. Of all the emotions I could've experienced in that moment (humiliation, awkwardness, fear, etc.), I felt hurt. Betrayal. I felt as though I'd been stabbed repeatedly, the pain intensifying with each jab at my flimsy heart.

Before I had the chance to do anything (stupid), Isaac directed his attention at me. He smiled "kindly." For a minute he really had me fooled.

"And for Zara." My name sounded like venom on his lips. It just wasn't right.

He slowly lifted his other hand, and I quickly remembered what he held in it. I felt the blood flee my cheeks. I felt Ella freeze next to me. This is it, I thought. This is how I was going to die; at the hands of an insane, backstabbing arsehole. I looked straight into the muzzle of the gun.

Darkness. Complete and utter, pitch black darkness. The same colour as Isaac's eyes.

I remembered something the pastor said. Something about how we return to the earth the same way we came from the earth. I felt the grass under my feet grip my ankles and pull me down. My feet sank into the dirt. I suppose Isaac's fake burial will be levelled with my real one.

I waited for something to happen. For him to shoot me, for Ella to knock the gun out of his hands, for him to suddenly burst out laughing and say, "I'm kidding, you stupid git!"

Instead, Isaac did the unthinkable. I'm sure that not even Ella anticipated this.

He rotated the gun around, the muzzle now stuck to his forehead. Then, giving me a pointed look, he uttered the most infernal words to ever grace his mouth.

"Nobody cares."

Then he pulled the trigger.