Caught Up In You

Bring it!

It's a foggy, kinda humid morning as I step outside my door to go for a 'up tempo stroll' as I like to call it. The sun is about to pop up and I push away the idea of taking a hipster selfie with my running shoes, like I'm sporty and all the other shit I'm not.

I don't even need those shoes really.

My coffee tasted bitter this morning. Perhaps it was the bitterness of leaving all you have ever known behind. The bitterness of saying goodbye for I don't know how long. The bad taste of jumping into the darkness that's called adventure.

I slowly start walking, struggeling with my earphones. It's a perfect day, I think as I walk down the boulevard that runs along the small river that dribbles through the whole city. This has always been my favorite place.

The streets start to come to life; shops open, people walk their dogs, big trucks from the suburbs drive into the city and although evertything that makes the world look beautiful and harmless, I feel down.

Where did I even get the idea of leaving my home town?

But by placing this question in my mind I get overrated by answers.

I thought so many times about this.

One: My life is boring

Two: I want to improve my photography

Three: I want to mean something in this world and I will never reach it if I stay here.

Of course I got two hundred more reasons why I shouldn't stay but these reasons have the priority.

Like in the words of John Green

"I go to seek a great perhaps"

Yup, it may sound cheesy but it actually is true. I need to rip myself out of my comfort zone, and by that comfort zone, I mean my bedroom.

My study is over so this is about to be my gap year.

At a rainy Sunday morning I looked at the map taped to my wall, thinking to myself: "If I really want it... Why not do it?"

So I grabbed a dart, closed my eyes, swung my hand back and slammed it at the map. I was afraid to open my eyes, but when I did and saw the dart pointing straight in the heart of Australia I knew it.

I was going to do this.

Alone.

My mom was very supportive and well, thats all I have? I'm far away from being the populair guy allthough i'm not fat or too skinny, just normal. I have brown eyes and the same dark brown hair color. My mom always told me I have gotten it from my dad but i'm not pretty sure.

I never met that guy anyway.

I don't have like loads of great friends. Jason, my best friend since kindergarten moved to Long Island last month and I'm just too shy to make new friends I guess. It's like my brain is sepertated in two parts that mostly get along pretty well. One part that does what is asked and knows how to act without standing out or being noticed - and the other part is one crazy outgoing bitch.

But sometimes when I'm scared or just frustrated these two parts crash.

Let that always be when I need to act normal.

Anyway, I have not much trouble leaving. I planned my trip, packed my camera equipment and some clothes. please get me on that plane a.s.a.p.

It's Thursday. My plane leaves in 14 hours. I'm flying third class, no need to act posh. My mind is like a blank piece of paper, ready to be colored. And thats what I'm about to do.

"Shall I drop you off at the airport or are you taking the train?" My mom looks at me and I know I have no choice.

I give her that smile you know every mom loves "I wouldn't want anything else."

We sit in the car in complete scilence. It's not the awkward kind, more like the time I lied watching the stars with Emily, my former girlfriend on the beach. We didn't talk much, we just enjoyed each others presence. Me and Emliy were more like brother and sister. I guess that's why 'us' didn't work out like we wanted to. But that night under the stars, sofly whispering so now and then, laughing, I will never forget.

Suddenly I feel really bad for leaving my mom. She doesn't diserve this after all she has done for me, although when I told her she said I had to go. "Ian" she said "You don't look like you, you don't act like you, and that means you are not fully enjoying yourself here. This will have a positive effect on you I know for sure. Loving someone means you have to let go sometimes, loosen the reins a bit. And that's why I'm encouraging to go. I love you Ian. And no one can take that away from you."

A/N

Soo this is the first chapter of my very first story!

Please keep in mind this is just Fiction, I made it all up!

Comment and vote away, I'd love to see what you guys think!

Don't kill me if my grammar sucks at some points, I'm Dutch and as you may know English isn't my first language. (but my fav)

See y'all in a next chapter!