oneshots ; multifandom

Whenever You're Ready | Shyan

[Welcome to the world of trans!ryan aus.]

Me:
wanna have sex when you come home

Me:
i’m bored

Shane:
sure, why not. see u then. smooches.

--

“Honey, I'm home!” Shane sings upon entering the apartment, tossing his stuff onto the floor by the door.

He walks into the living room where he sees his boyfriend, Ryan, lying on the floor like a dead starfish. Shane nudges Ryan with his foot.

“What… are you doing?” Shane asks. Ryan blinks lazily up at him.

“I'm bored,” Ryan says blandly. He sighs and adds, “And horny. Hungry. Maybe a little sad.”

Shane stares down at him, thinking. Suddenly, he brightens up and says, “Well, I know a cure for all of those things.”

“Haven't you noticed that the day or a few days after my T shot, I always get like this. Shot. Hungry, horny, sad. Shot. Hungry, horny, sad. Rinse and repeat cycle.” Ryan stands up and lays his head on Shane's chest, loosely hooking his arms around his waist.

Shane hugs Ryan too, though a little tighter. He takes a deep breath, smelling his tiny boyfriend, catching scents of pomegranate and whatever Old Spice deodorant he uses.

“Did… did you just smell me?” Ryan asks, voice muffled. He loops his thumbs through the back belt loop of Shane's pants.

“Yeah. You're my boyfriend, I'm allowed to do that, right?” Shane asks back, smiling, nuzzling his nose into Ryan’s styled black hair.

Ryan giggles sweetly. “I'm still feeling pretty shitty and bored though, so can we go-?”

Shane smiles softly, slipping his hands down Ryan’s sweats, cupping his ass easily. “Definitely.”

The bedroom smells like vanilla cake batter, a stupid Yankee Candle Ryan bought ‘cause he “needed it.” It's not unpleasant, though, quite welcome in fact.

Shane undoes his pants, stripping off his shirt and tosses them somewhere in the room. He watches Ryan climb onto the mattress, sweats off and discarded by the bed.

Ryan slowly takes off his shirt, not because he was trying to be sexy, but because he doesn't really wants Shane to see his chest binder. Even though Shane knows his secret.

Shane hasn't even seen Ryan without it on. During the night when they're sleeping, Ryan always wears a shirt and boxers when Shane wears nothing. During… times like these, he usually wears it (or a shirt) or the lights are completely off, and they're both fumbling around in the dark. (Shane had lit the candle and the soft, warm candlelight highlighted Ryan’s body perfectly.)

“Hey, baby, we don't have to do this now, if you're uncomfortable,” Shane says, tracing his finger down the middle of the black half-shirt Ryan wears.

“No, no. I want to. I just… the lights are usually off,” Ryan answers quietly. Self-consciously, he runs his fingers up and down the strap of his binder.

Shane turns off the lights, casting the room in almost complete darkness. Light comes through the curtains, washing the room in a soft blue color.

Sitting down between Ryan’s thighs again, Shane runs his hands up them. His hand go over the slight bumps of Ryan’s hip bones and come back down to his thighs.

“Ry?” Shane asks. “Can I ask you a question?”

“You just did,” Ryan says like a smartass. The blue light makes his eyes look even more stunning.

“Hush, you.” Shane follows his own advice and bites his lip, trying to think of what to say. “Why don't you ever.. why don't you ever take this off and let me see?”

Ryan sits up, inches away from Shane’s face. “Can we not talk about that right now and just have sex, please?” Ryan kisses Shane.

Shane pulls away, running his index finger down Ryan's jaw and neck. “Ryan…”

Ryan shuts his eyes and sighs. “Okay, fine… taking this off like… hammering the last nail in the coffin.” He says, resting his forehead on Shane’s shoulder.

“Can you… explain this more to me?” Shane asks, running his fingers through Ryan's hair.

“Taking it off and, and letting you see would… I dunno, prove to you that I'm not… y’know… completely male?” Ryan says so quietly, he might’ve just whispered it. “It's.. a lot. A-and I've never shown… anybody before.”

Shane feels his throat close up and tears well up in his eyes. His boyfriend, wrapped around him, is so vulnerable and small and he just wants to protect him.

Shane lifts Ryan’s face from his shoulder and looks him in the eyes. “I know I don't completely understand this… this whole “transgender” thing sometimes, but I want to help you feel more comfortable with me. Can I confess something?”

Ryan nods, sniffing and wiping his nose with his hand.

“You're more man than any other man I've met, ever. You deal with so much shit everyday and you're so strong,” Shane says, wiping Ryan's tears away. Shane feels his own tears dripping down his own face and smiles at his boyfriend. “You're my boyfriend. You're sweet, charming and so kind to others. You're funnier than anybody else I've met.”

Ryan sniffs again. He drapes his legs over Shane’s, scooting closer. “Say more things like that.”

“You're everything I need in my life right now, and I don't ever want anybody else. I only need you, Ryan,” Shane says softly. “Because I love you.”

Ryan buries his faces into the crook of Shane’s neck and shoulder, trying not to cry harder. They sit like that, both crying until they've calmed down enough to speak.

“I love you too, Shane,” Ryan confesses, kissing Shane softly. “You're my everything.”

Shane lays Ryan down, cuddling him. “We don't have to have sex tonight, baby. Later we will.”

Ryan thanks him and asks him to turn around so he can change. Shane closes his eyes, turns around and hums Shakira loudly, making Ryan roll his eyes.

Ryan undresses completely, binder and all and tosses on a shirt and some of Shane’s boxers.

“Okay. Can we cuddle?” Ryan asks, shyly.

“For sure,” Shane answers laying back down and wrapping his arms around Ryan, who's laying his head on top of Shane’s chest.

“Mm… Shane?” Ryan mumbles tiredly.

Shane doesn't say anything, just traces his fingertips along Ryan’s skin. His nose is buried, again, into Ryan’s hair.

“Someday… I'll show you, y’know. I'm just not ready yet,” Ryan snuggles closer, pressing his whole body against Shane's. “I love you.”

“Take your time, my love.” Shane kisses Ryan's temple, holding his tiny, insecure boyfriend as close as fucking possible.