Misunderstood

desire

"You have to feed you desire Loki, as long as they are not destructive, " Frigga confidently told me with a chuckle.

"I think I love her mother, but what if she doesn't love me back?" I mumbled in my sleep,"

"you must keep you head up high spend time with her get to know her," I was awake much too soon and my mother was gone from my dreams. Did she really come and give me advice? No she couldn't she is dead. I really need to stop kidding myself like this, it was just another abnormal dream. I woke up feeling very lonely and in need of someone's or something's love. People who knew me would think I have no feeling or needs to be loved but I do just like, or more then anyone else. I WILL GET A DOG! I said out loud to no one but myself, as I jumped out of bed. Later that Friday I made a very impulse decision. I got a male pit bull pix from the animal shelter and decided to name her Buck, but not before I went to petsmart, a animal supply shop, to get the essentials, a bed, a emerald green collar, food, dishes, toys etc. I was so excited to bring him home after a visit to the vet to make sure he had all his shots and all that stuff. The vet figured he was probably abused as a puppy do to her scaring. I was disturbingly happy to hear this, not the fact that he was abused but the fact that we had something to bond over. When we got home I let Buck sleep for a while then called Rachel and told her I was now a doggy daddy. She came over right away to meat Buck, they got along really well.

"I always saw you as more of a cat person," Rachel said to me as when she came over,

"I really like most animals, but I really do like dogs, they make me feel loved and safe," The weekend went by really fast Rachel, Buck, and I spent most of it at the park. Rachel even convinced me to get a hair cut! She took me to a salon calle Great Clips and I left with short hair and the something the hairdresser called a 'cliff' I am not yet sure how I feel about it, but Rachel seemed to sure love it.

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Work was fun, at first I questioned why I was the only male who was employed, but it didn't take long to figure that out.. I never quite thought of myself as attractive until today. The woman who was training me, Linda, had obviously unnatural bright red hair. Pretty girl though, she was talking in a funny way to me Rachel calls it flirting a lot of the female customers seemed to be doing this with me as well. It made me feel unloyal toward Rachel considering the feelings I have toward her. Work was weird, but fun too. I come back on Wednesday, I am looking forward to spending more time with Rachel and Buck tomorrow.