Tattooed Away

Chapter 5

The front door was opened for us by a scaly rabbit, whose ears twitched as it said with a heavy lisp, "Have a nice day dearies."  With a double take, I noticed a forked tongue slip from its mouth as it spoke.  As we left the sanctuary of my building, Aika took off with a leap and I followed close behind. It was just getting light this morning and the sunrise was a strange green and purple color instead of the normal blue and pink.  The foreign bombardment of smells, sights, and sounds continued as we soared through the streets.  

The air almost as busy above the street as the pavement was below.  Dipping and dodging, stopping and tilting, speeding up and slowing down.  It was clear Aika did not know I got motion sick.  But other than that, it seemed like she had exaggerated a little.  No one cared about me up here, I barely even got a second look.  There didn't seem to be anyone trying to sabotage my existence in the real world as she had warned me about.  I definitely needed her to slow down though, Aika's silken black hair was beginning to disappear from view.  Seeing an opening between two very large bottomed creatures in front of me I twirled between them with my arms tight against my body and my legs pointed sharp.  I felt like a tiny missile squeezing between hot air balloons.  

Despite my effort, I lost her.  She was right about herself not being a tour guide.  Now I didn't know what direction to turn.  I just floated, hoping to see her dart back around a city block and show me the way.  I waited so long that the creatures I flew through passed me again.  I got a good look at their faces.  Wide smiles, tiny eyes, and massive ears fluttering up and down.  Some sort of human Dumbos. As they passed me by there was a distinct noise of farting and the pair was shot forward in the air with distinct acceleration.  I fell to the ground with force.

I was right about them being filled with hot air.  Not the good kind though.  It was truly the foulest smelling moment of my entire life.  I was terrified to breathe again.  I counted to myself and held my breath for ninety seconds and then took a small inhale through my mouth.  I needed something to replace this horrid memory, looking around I saw the most friendly sign I could imagine.  A bright, neon doughnut.  I love doughnuts.  They are always in the house but fresh ones are my favorite, especially when the icing is nice and hot.  With resolved direction I stood quickly, brushed myself off and headed into the welcoming bakery.

Ding, ding, ding.

Some eyes darted up to meet mine as I entered into the warm, sweet smelling room.  

"Hello, human, how can I help you?" The bright red parrot said from behind the counter.  Around its waist was a frilly apron and on its head was a top hat.

"Hi! I like your hat! Can I please have a doughnut, they smell amazing!"  Always a bit too enthusiastic for my own good, but I think I made the bird smile.

"Sure thing sweetie, here is our special unicorn flavor."  It pointed over its shoulder with a feather at the unicorns that could be glimpsed in the kitchen. "Those guys are the best bakers around."

As I took a bite into my beautifully tasting doughnut, I felt a tingle rush to the top of my head.  With a groan I look at the bird and give it a big thumbs up.  This dimension really knows how to treat a girl.  

"Love it, seriously." I say with another happy sigh.  Turning, I walk towards the door thinking I will now find Aika.  Instead, my head hits the top of the door frame.  Looking up, I see that I am still very much five feet tall and the door is high above me.  Again, I try to walk through only to meet another feeling of resistance. I lick my fingers free of icing and reach over my head.  A growing panic fills my innards as I move my hands all over the towering bunny ears growing from my head.  I dart over to the window and glimpse my reflection.  I look exactly like the cover of my Dangerous Woman cover, but it is real.  I have bunny ears! Holy shit! My new additions finally pick up on the cackling all around me.  I spin around to see every patron in the cafe laughing and pointing at me.  Oh my goodness, what have I done.