Caged

Chapter 28.

I gasped and slowly stepped closer to him, pressing my hand against his chest as he stared down at me, his arms instinctively wrapping loosely around my waist. "Did she seem...taken care of?" I asked quietly.

His eyes swirled and his hand reached up to stroke my hair. "She looked fine. Happy enough. She's so young .She doesn't even seem to know anything's wrong."

I released a shaky breath and nodded slowly, trying to picture her. "Tell me about her. What does she look like?"

"She has bouncy blonde curls, just like her beautiful mom, that fall just below her shoulders. Her skin is creamy and smooth just like yours, and she has two of the most stunning ocean blue eyes I've ever seen, outside of your own." He held my gaze captive as his voice dropped lower and his eyes began to swirl darker. The little girl from my feverish hallucination sprung into my mind and before I could ask he was nodding. "She's beautiful Lili. She's all you."

My heart swelled at his words. He looked almost prideful as he looked down at me, like I was one in a million and only this moment right here mattered.

How could he be proud of me? How could he accept me after all this, knowing I'd had a child with another male, with someone who was so terrible? He'd be forced to accept my daughter as his own, knowing he may never be able to have one of his own with me.

I shook the negative thoughts from my head, trying to erase the countless memories of nights sweating from fever, barely living through the infection that had wreaked havoc on my body. Nearly killed me.

An overwhelming shame was beginning to eat at me, twisting my insides into tight knots and I didn't know how long I could hold it all inside. I stepped out of his grasp and gripped my hands into the railing at an attempt to hold me to the ground as I looked out into the dark forest in front of me.

"Don't do that." I whispered through clenched teeth.

He exhaled and stepped closer, but was careful not to touch me. "Do what?" he asked, confusion lacing his voice.

I closed my eyes and tried to focus on my breathing instead of the memories flooding my mind of the last three years of my life. The life I could have had with my daughter. "Look at me like you couldn't be more proud to have me standing in front of you. Like I'm the only person in the world."

He sighed as his fingers tapped absently on the wood next to me before leaning forward to rest his forearms against the railing.

"It's the truth." His voice was quiet, deep in thought as my eyes opened.

I turned to look at him as he faced out in front of us, breathing deeply before turning back to me.

"How can you say that?" I said in a breath.

His eyes swirled, filling with emotion as they pierced into mine, capturing my gaze and not releasing it as he stepped closer, slowly closing the distance between us. His hand gently brushed my hair from my face, tucking it behind my ear.

I shook my head, feeling tears stinging my eyes. "I mean it Rhett. How could you possibly still want me knowing what you know? I've tried to run from every dark part of me. Tried to hide the ugly scars scored into my soul, but they keep clinging to me, following me everywhere I go like shadows."

"Lili, you're mine. Scars and all." His voice was deeper than before, almost husky as his eyes turned nearly indigo.

My breath stalled and I felt my heart do the same before I blinked back at him, unable to look away.

"Are you ready?" He asked after what felt like an eternity.

"For what?" I asked quietly.

He smirked and pulled me into a tender kiss. "To go and get them?"

I threw my arms around his neck as I smiled against his lips, leaning into him as he picked me up off of the floor. "More than you'll ever know." I whispered as I kissed him deeply.

He gently placed me back down on the wooden planks beneath our feet and stroked my cheek gently. "Come on then. Time to get the plan together. We leave tonight."

He laced his hand with mine and moved to walk away from the balcony, but I tugged him back. He stopped and turned to face me with a look of confusion. "What is it?"

I felt an overwhelming need to share with him as the hum of the bond surged through my fingers, radiating through my palm and up my arm before warming through my chest.

"What if I'm no good at this? What if...she hates me? I don't think I could take it if she wants to...stay with him." I said, my voice breaking with emotion.

His eyes warmed and his expression softened as he turned around, gently pulling me to step closer into his arms. His free hand reached up to cup my cheek, stroking down my jawline as he spoke. "You're going to be wonderful. You're her mother. She's going to love you."

His eyes captured me and I felt as if I was floating in his steel blue pools. I nodded shortly, reaching up to press my hand against his as I leaned into his touch. My cheek tingled beneath his palm and my heart fluttered furiously in my chest.

"Rhett...I..." I started but the words caught in my throat.

I wanted to tell him everything, how much he meant to me. But I couldn't. I wasn't ready to share that part of me yet. I wasn't ready to completely let him in to see the very depths of me, or give him the very power he already held over me.

After a moment, he leaned forward, pressing a kiss against my forehead. "I wish I could take the shadows away from you." He spoke into my flesh, his breath warm against me as my body shuddered. "But they're part of what makes you you. They're what make you so strong Lili."

I sighed and pressed my cheek against his chest as his strong arms wrapped tighter around me, holding me close as he breathed in my scent, kissing the top of my head through my hair. "It's going to be all right. We're going to get her and she's going to adore you. Hold on to that. Trust me."

I nodded against him and let his scent surround me, overwhelming my senses with comfort. "Ok Rhett. Let's go get them."