Two Free Uncles Loving to the Beat

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Camila Cabello was thinking about Lauren Jauregui again. Lauren was a young fake woke with brunette armpits and a thicc butt.

Camila walked over to the window and reflected on her okkrrrrrrrr surroundings. She had always loved the eeeeeooowwww that the bronx had with its curved, curvy cardi b. It was a place that encouraged her tendency to feel depressed.

Then she saw something in the distance, or rather someone. It was the young figure of Lauren Jauregui.

Camila gulped. She glanced at her own reflection. She was a dumb, dark, drinker of lean, with obese armpits and skinny butts. Her friends saw her as a curvy cuban slut. Once, she had even helped a lively boob cross the road. But not even a dumb person who had once helped a lively boob cross the road, was prepared for what Lauren had in store today.

The hotter than hell sun teased like hurting mattress, making Camila obese. Camila grabbed a skinny banana that had been strewn nearby; she massaged it with her fingers. 

As Camila stepped outside and Lauren came closer, she could see the thoughtless glint in her eye. Lauren gazed with the affection of cheap plain pete davidson. She said, in hushed tones, "I love you and I want nut."

Camila looked back, even more obese and still fingering the skinny banana. "Lauren, allysus is our lord," she replied.

They looked at each other with horny feelings, like two tasteless, tender ty dolladollabills healing at a very wild 5h concert, which had thowless webb music playing in the background and two free uncles loving to the beat.

Suddenly, Lauren lunged forward and tried to punch Camila in the face. Quickly, Camila grabbed the skinny banana and brought it down on Lauren's skull. Lauren's brunette armpits trembled and her thicc butts wobbled. She looked irrelevant, her emotions raw like a different, doubtful dinah jane.

Then she let out an agonising groan and collapsed onto the ground. Moments later Lauren Jauregui was dead.

Camila Cabello went back inside and made herself a nice drink of lean.

- oprah




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