Monster Factory

Chapter 3

Goblins and all sorts of monsters were categorized into levels. Level threes were the equivalents of grade five kids. They were also not quite completely formed, which meant that a level three goblin was small enough and jelly enough to fit through a keyhole, or even the tiniest crack in the floor.

Wychwood Academy was over three hundred years old and had a ton of cracks. In the walls, in the ceilings and definitely in the floors.

"If this is a level three, you know its catch and release," Ruby told me. "You can't keep a level three."

"I know, Ruby."

We both watched the delicious piece of peanut butter chocolate bar twirl at the end of the light switch string. The closet floor creaked ever so quietly, and then it groaned.

Slowly, the cracks in the floorboards filled with green slime.

I knew it.

No goblin in the world could resist this chocolate bar.

The slime spread across the floorboards and began to pool into an oozy green puddle. Out of that tiny puddle rose a long hooked nose.

The nose was green, and its wide nostrils flared as it caught a whiff of the peanut butter chocolate delicacy hanging from the string.

My whole body tensed. I didn't breathe, and I didn't speak. I shot a glance at Ruby who looked at the emerging goblin like it was a pail full of cute fluffy puppies.

I shook my head.

Girls.

The goblin gained strength from the goo pushing through the cracks. The nose gave way to a wide mouth full of small sharp little teeth and a large chin. Finally, the goblin's full head popped out. He snapped at the candy on the string, but it was still too high.

The goblin grunted and sighed and, with a wet thwack, pulled first his right hand out of the floor, and then his left. His tiny black eyes scanned the closet, sniffing the air, looking for any sign of danger.

Finding none, he pressed down on the floorboards and heaved the lower half of his body through the tiny gap in the wood.

He plopped down, sitting directly on the containment rune I had drawn in chalk.

I stared at the goblin, and I could almost see through him. My clothes on the opposite side of him appeared distorted through the greasy film of his body. He looked like someone had sculpted a chubby ten year old kid out of sixty pounds of green hair gel.

"Awww," Ruby said. "He's so cute."

After a final check around the closet, the goblin reached up, slipped his clawed hand around the piece of candy and yanked down hard.

He was so strong, even at this age, that in his attempt to pull down just the candy, he tore down the string and the light fixture as well. In a single quick snap of his jaws, he tipped back his head and popped everything in his mouth in one massive bite. The monster crunched through the plastic and metal of the light fixture. His long forked tongue worked to slurp down the gooey bits of chocolate and peanut butter. He chomped down again and again, not missing an ounce of the sugary goodness.

Gross.

Halfway through, he gagged and spit out the mangled light fixture in a spray of goo, coating half the clothes in my closet.

Okay, I thought. That was it.

I burst out from under the pile of clothes, pointed at him and screamed, "HA!"

The goblin's black eyes popped open as wide as dinner plates, and his mouth dropped open in a terrified scream. "AHHHHHHHHHH!"

He scrambled to his chubby feet but, before he could get away, I completed the containment spell by saying the final word that made all the magic happen: "Sleep."

The containment rune began to glow a sickly green and, a second later, there was a brilliant flash of green light, followed by a puff of bitter black smoke, which quickly filled the closet and threatened to choke me out. I pushed through the pile of clothes and shoved open my closet door, allowing the plume of offending smoke to filter out into my room.

When the haze cleared, I found a small green glass statue in the centre of the containment rune. I stared at the little face of the trapped goblin.

"What are you going to do with him?" Ruby said.

"I haven't decided yet." I told her.

"You should leave him with the maintenance staff. They'll release him somewhere away from Wychwood."

I told her I would do that and stuffed the glass statue of the goblin into my pocket as along with the rest of the chocolate bar.

Ruby glanced at the digital clock by my bed, and her face fell.

"What time was our meeting with the dean?" I asked her.

"We are so dead," she replied.