nothing more fragile

scene i: takes place in a coffee shop.

(See the end of the work for notes.)

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Rebecca did not want to have any coffee that day; yet she took sips from the cup she had ordered, until the sensation that felt almost stinging on her tongue amalgamated into nothing but a pause - until she could not distinguish the taste at all. A sort of a numbness had diffused across her skin in a ricochet pattern and she did not seem to mind, instead she embraced the very existence of such an emotion. She craved for a concoction that would numb her thoughts that were scattered almost as if they were cracked on purpose. She tried to focus on her companion, Anne; who sat across her, whose placid nature had been transfused into her own aura. Rebecca had not known Anne since very long, but they had formed a bond; not easily deciphered but it seemed to have been reserved just for the other as though they were in each other all along.

Anne smiled the minute she caught Rebecca glance at her, it held a foreign emotion Anne could not place immediately and it let loose a fury of sensations that thrashed violently in the pit of her stomach. 

‘Are you alright?’ inquired Anne, her voice subtle; but each syllable dripped with a form of worry that resurfaced only in the presence of Rebecca.

‘I'm... Fine,’ said Rebecca, her voice uncertain. And in a dire need of diverting the conversation elsewhere, she gave a disheartened chuckle; drank a little out of the cup and let the tepid liquid course through her throat and hoped Anne did not realise her lie. Rebecca had been always comfortable lying, it became a habit she need not part with as it gave her an excuse to part with impending decisions and to repress thoughts she need not share. Only occasionally did a lie slip onto the bay of her conscience, to come out as an uncertain voice.

Anne did not want to bother Rebecca with unnecessary accusations, and she took the lie unaided to a refuge in her mind; and imagined a conversation between her and Rebecca, where she would be Rebecca's bedrock, to wipe away sorrows that consumed her existence and to extinguish any worries that crept into her docile mind.

‘To tell you the truth, I honestly don't know,’ Rebecca stated, her voice carried no hint nor any feeling, the statement seemed vacuous to the point where it created a vacuum in her thoughts; repression at its very best. She clenched and unclenched her hand, underneath the table, for she had no idea how to continue. Every corner of her mind had been stacked sky-high with thoughts she did not want to convey and with emotions she did not want to feel. A scream lodged itself in the base of her throat, and she did not know how to let it out, as though she had forgotten what it felt to let her emotions tumble out with uncertainty.

‘It's as if I'm a piece of porcelain that's been shattered against a wall and... I'm in the midst of the pieces that lay scattered but I can't put them back together. Others see me as a piece of art; a mosaic that hasn't been completed yet, but I'm not what they think I am.’ Her mind, replayed all the acidulous remarks from those close that comprised of the denigration of her character, and the menial time where she could chronicle her sorrows through tears, that lay scattered across her pillow, almost translucent.

‘Every scattered piece creates a blemish that transfuses you into a new portrait,’ said Anne. ‘Sometimes what dismays you, disparates you into a whole new entity like the powers of regeneration; brutal but resurrecting, and at the same bailing you out from the dungeons you entrapped yourself in.’

In that moment, a silence had resonated in the atmosphere of the Café, almost as if it were an uninvited friend that seeped into their conversation and quieted them. Anne's answer was a balm that did not absorb through to Rebecca's skin to null the pain, instead it acted only to soothe it; even if it were for a while, Rebecca relished in those words, and she hoped to preserve the scene in her memory, in a loop lost in her own private limbo. Her cup now empty, awaited to be refilled.

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A/N: Hello to everyone on Wattpad, I come in peace! “nothing more fragile” is in participation of the “imperfectdare” by beyoutiful1D as I only came across it recently. I will update everyday due to the dare/challenge and I hope you enjoy the little journey you will experience with Rebecca and Anne.