Chapter One

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I woke up and heard Philip in the kitchen. It was kind of weird cause he sleeps till five in the afternoon and it was only twelve. "Philip?" I said walking into the kitchen trying to fix my hair a little. "Yea?" Philip said from the kitchen eating a taco from Taco Bell. "Your up already?" I asked confussed as I sat at the table across from him. "I havent been to bed yet dude." He said laughing. "And you do know we're going to the stuido today right?" I said getting a little angry. "Really dude? Didnt we go to the studio yesterday all fucking day?" He said getting agrevated. "Yes, but you know we got to get this record done before warped tour starts right?" I explained to him. "I fucking made plans last night." He said getting agrevated. "Well cancel cause today we lay down voxx and you do back up." I said getting fed up with it and going upstairs to get dressed. I seriously needed some starbucks right now.

"Michael, really? Starbucks again?" Aaron said laughing at me. "I gotta have my coffee before laying some voxx down! Do you not know anything?" I said laughing back at him. "Both of you hush. Michael get in there and start screaming." My producer, Mike, told me. I sat my coffee down after taking a big drink and walked into the recording box. I shut all the lights off and lit my red candle. "What song do you want to start with?" Mike said through the intercom. "I think I wanna start with, 'Amanda's Song." I told him. He nodded his head and started the recording we did yesterday of the instruments. I took a deep breath and thought long and hard. I saw Amandas face, and a tear formed in my eye as I started to sing the first few lyrics of the song into the mic, "It's neurotic to trust me. I am nothing to you. Just another worm, filled with violent views." I started to get angry at the fact of how someone I loved so much, and shared so much energy with, up and left me. Left me with nothing. I gritted my teeth and started to scream a little harder, "You are my plague, inside of me! You are my plague, feeding on me!" Memories started to fill my head. How I almost asked her to marry me. I couldnt even stand to trust someone as much as I had her. "Hold up." I said as I stopped singing. "Everything okay Michael?" Mike asked me as he cut the music. "Yea, I just need a minute." I told him as I knelt down to the floor. I felt as if I was about to have another anxiety attack. I wiped my eyes with my jacket sleave and stood back up. "Im ready." I said taking another deep breath. "Alright. From the start." Mike said as he started to play the music again. I was ready this time. I blocked my emotions deep inside, hoping maybe they wouldnt come back out.

After the studio, I had laid down two songs. It took almost all day just for those two songs. My stupid emotions were getting the best of me today and im not so sure why. It was almost eleven o'clock before Philip and I got back to the apartment. "I need a drink." I said walking to my liquor cabnet and grabbing a bottle of Jack. "I would be out with my girlfriend, but someone gives me slave work." Philip said angrily under his breath. "Excuse me?" I said sitting down on the couch and glaring at him. "You heard me! Slave work!" He yelled at me. "Slave work? Really?" I said getting frustrated. Philip just shook his head. "Get out. Go fuck your pornstar girlfriend." I said pointing at the door. "Gladly. At least I can keep a girlfriend." Philip yelled back as he grabbed his wallet and walked out the door. I took a big glup of Jack and threw the bottle at the door as hard as I could. I watched the glass break everywhere and the remaining liquid hit the floor. I threw my hands up and walked to my room. I fell onto the bed and looked at my fake fire place. I started to think to myself, was Andy the reason Philip started acting like this? Hes been different ever since they got together. I mean, Dj and Cynthia are perfectly fine. They've been together a few months. Same with Aaron and Amber, and they've been together over a year now. But thinking about loved ones made me think about Amanda. Thats the last person I wanted to think about. I got disgusted and pulled my phone out to look at twitter. Im sure the fans had something to make my mood better. I looked threw my mentions to see what fans were saying about me. I saw a few that made me laugh and RT'd them. I started to feel a little better. At least until I saw this girls tweet. The tweet she said replayed in my mind, 'My past love is really getting to me lately, the only way I seem to feel sane is listen to @michaelvampire's voice.' She was going through what I was. I wanted to reply to her and just spill everything and tell her I know how she felt, but I just couldnt, so I kept to myself and sat my phone back down. I just laid there for hours until it was about 3am. The best hour of all. I rushed down stairs and grabbed my favorite wine glass and a bottle of wine and came straight back to my room. I sat on my bed and poured about half a glass, took a sip, and just looked at my white walls and listened to the haunting sounds that entered my room.

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