The Joker's Sister

Gap Year

I woke up. My head hurt and my vision was blurry at first. I sat up and realised where I was. Did I walk all the way to the angel oak tree? I sighed. My eyes were puffy, and my throat was parched, so dry, I couldn't even swallow spit. I raked a hand through my hair and tied it into two braids. At least that way it wouldn't look so messy. I stood up and straightened my clothes. There was a stream nearby so I made my way there.

I sat down on a rock, letting my feet submerge into the rushing water. I washed my face and hands before getting up again and making my way back to the university. I went round to all my teachers and handed in all my assignments. Graduation was only a week away. I could hold out until then.
~~~~~~~~~
I answered my phone.
"Kid? Where are you?" Yoongi.

"In South Korea".

"Where in South Korea?"

"Seoul".

"Where in Seoul?"

"Outside your dorm".

The door opened immediately after that and Yoongi was still holding his phone to his ear. He pulled me inside and I stood face to face with the rest of Bangtan except for Namjoon and Jimin. My brother immediately rushed to hug me. I closed my eyes and enjoyed his warmth.
  
"What happened? You sent a text to me saying you needed help... but you didn't answer any of our calls!" I looked at him in confusion. Then it dawned on me that in my hazy state last night, I texted him.

"Sorry, I wasn't thinking. A lot happened..." I looked up and met his eyes. I could see the worry he was in. I smiled," I'm fine now. I just... stressed out and I'm fine now,". I was lying, and I think Yoongi knew it too but thankfully he didn't say anything. The guys nodded and resumed their activities, a heavy air of awkwardness remained. We ate some food before they headed to the studio to resume practice. I sighed as I, too, left and headed for the graveyard. I looked for her stone and sat down beside it.

"Hey, Cho. How are you? I don't know how I'm feeling at the moment. I think you know what's happened. since you always knew what happened to me. I don't feel like myself. I broke up with Namjoon and it feels...weird. It feels empty but full as well. I'm confused, I don't know what to do... help?" I wasn't about to let my tears slip now, not in front of her anyways, "I was thinking, after graduating, I should try to find a job in another country, away from the guys. Not permanently, obviously. Just, long enough for me to regain sense. What do you think?" The wind blew. I smiled. She'd always support me no matter what my decision.

~~~~~~~~~

I packed a bag of all my belongings as quickly as I could. I was currently in my dorm and I wanted to get out before Young-Il came. My stuff, Cho's stuff, books, posters. I managed to finish and head out of campus quickly and made my way back to Bangtan's dorm. I was going to tell Taehyung Oppa about my decision since I had already told Cho and my parents were next on the list after him. I rung the doorbell and a rather tired looking Jimin opened the door.
"Mi-Hi-ah? What are you doing here?" He looked really worried.

"I just wanted to give this to Taetae-Oppa... Are they back yet? It's getting really late..." I asked.

"No...sorry. Just me and Namjoon-Hyung," I looked away at the mention of his name," By the way, is there something I should know? Hyung didn't come back all night yesterday and we found him in the studio, but he wasn't making songs or raps or anything- he was staring at the walls,"

"I don't know, why don't you just ask him?" I said, with a hint of coldness, "I should go. Could you please give this to Oppa for me?" I said goodbye, handing him an envelope. It had a letter to my graduation ceremony and also had a letter from me, explaining my plans. Looks like Bangtan didn't know about the breakup then.

I realised then that I had left my Phone charger in the dorm back in college... Why? I sighed as I made my way back there.
I opened the door and no one was there. I quickly unplugged the charger from the socket but before I could exit, Young-il came in.

"Mi-Hi! What the hell are you doing here? The strip clubs aren't here!" She cackled.

"What more do you want from me? You took my boyfriend, your boyfriend took my friend and now you've stooped low enough to take my dignity. What have I ever done to you?" I gritted my teeth.

"Trust me, you've caused Young enough pain and that hurt me too! You're a b**** and you know it!" She slapped me and before she landed another blow, I pushed her away and ran out. It was dark now and I headed to the studio Bangtan were in.

The staff knew me well so they let me in and immediately, Yoongi came out. "I'm going for Icecream and Mi-Hi's coming with me!" He called out before dragging me away.
"Explain," He said as he bought the two of us a cone each.

"I broke up with Namjoon." I choked. He nodded, "He said that he'd rather be with my roommate than me and believed her when she accused me of doing things I didn't do." He was silent.

"Either you talk to him or I will," He said after I finished off giving him every last detail. I shook my head.

"Yoongi-ya, I told you all this because I don't want to burden my brother and Eui's not here. Unlike the others, you keep your cool and don't overreact, so please don't. I'm not going to talk to him yet. I'm taking the year off after graduation and maybe go someplace out of the country. It's painful just to hear his name and I have no idea what else to do!" He hesitantly put a hand on my shoulder as I let my tears slip. It felt good to let them out.

"You don't have to talk to him, but I will. I'm being honest with you, even if you tell me not to, I will. We found him in an extremely depressing state this morning when we went to the studio. Jimin was there before us and apparently, he had been crying and pulling his hair. Both of you are idiots and both of you are hurting. You should go take the year off. Let out some steam and sort your head out before coming back," He said. I wiped my tears and smiled.

Thank you,". After a while, we went back to the dorms and by then, Oppa had read the letter I left him. I finished explaining everything and slept over. 

"You're gonna be ok, right?" Taehyung said as he pulled the covers over us.

"Yes. I think I am" I smiled.
~~~~~~~~~
One week later

After the ceremony, the girls, Yoongi and Oppa came with me to the airport. Eui had come back a few days ago so she was there too.

"We're going to miss you!" She waved as I headed for the security check. I smiled and walked away. Pretty soon, I was boarded onto the plane and was about to plug my headphones in when I got a text. I looked at it and almost dropped my phone

Namjoon: Have a safe flight. We'll miss you.

I sent a reply, against my better judgement.

Me: Thank you. I'll miss everyone too.

Namjoon: I'm sorry... I miss you... I need u...

I choked and began to sob. I couldn't reply and left him hanging. I didn't have any strength or courage to send him a reply, but I spoke it aloud instead.
"Me too"