Deadpool is web swinging through New York City with the web shooters he got from Spider-Man. "Yeaaaaaaah!" Deadpool exclaims. As he goes to shoot his next web he gets a dart shot into his neck. "Buttermilk, biscuit." He falls, smacks into a building, and falls into a dump truck.
He wakes up in a cell across from X23. "Y'know I've pictured this moment before and we were wearing much less-" X23 slaps him. "Ow! Where are we, anyway?"
"No clue. But they're using some sort of hard light containment field. It incinerates anything that gets through it save for my claws."
"Can't you just walk through it then? Kinda like Logan?" Deadpool asks.
"Unlike him only my claws are adamantium. The rest of me would be incinerated. You got anything?"
"Let's see. Oh let's see if they found my scrambler gun!" He checks all his pockets and finds nothing. "Nope stripped me down and took everything. Sounds like my weekend in Vegas. There's one more spot to check but without my knife I'll need some, help. I need you to stab me." X23 gets a crooked grin and pops her claws. "Hey! Ya don't have to look so excited about it!" He shows her where to cut and she slices him open. She pulls out a small metal disc. "It's a sonic scrambler. It releases a pulse that paralyzes all who hear it. I, uh, borrowed it from Stark when we went to stop Rhino and Ock."
"If it paralyzes all who hear it then how do we manage to get away?"
"There's some earplugs in the bag. Unfortunately there's only one pair so we need to figure out who gets them. Rock, paper-"
"How about I use them so I can carry your sorry ass out of here?"
"That works too." Someone walks over and opens the cell. The lights on their collars light up. "I wouldn't do anything rash. Those collars have Carbonadium emitters." Says a man with a German accent. "It'll block your healing factor and make you as killable as the rest of us. Now, right this way. Oh and allow me to formally welcome you to the Nursery" Deadpool and X23 share a look, quickly realizing it'll be more complicated than they originally thought. They're lead down a hall to a walkway over a small laboratory. "The name's Dr. Chapman. I'm a huge fan of you two. You each represent years of research, years of planning, and to the effect of outstanding success. Wade Wilson, AKA "Deadpool." You're essentially unkillable. It says here you even reformed from a pile of goo and were able to survive Ghost Rider's penance stare. and Laura Kinney, AKA "X23" but you also go by "Wolverine," right? First successful clone of Logan, AKA "Wolverine" or "Weapon X.""
"So what is this place? a Weapons Plus facility?" X23 Snaps
"No, that program will become obsolete with our research. We intend to take it to the next level. Take their two greatest successes and make them even better. To create the perfect soldier. We call it "Project X-pool.""
"Is it bad I find that name totally bad ass?" X23 uses the claw in her boot to stab Deadpool through his foot. "Ou-!" X23 elbows him in the throat, stiffing his scream. Dr. Chapman turns around and looks at Wade. "Are you okay, Mr. Wilson?"
"Yes, it's the cancer. Without his healing factor it's starting to take a toll on his body." X23 covers. "Well we'll be returning you to your cells now. That'll be it for the tour today."
"Why take us on a tour anyway?" X23 asks. "Because we know when you see our creation. then you'll be more than willing to help us make sure it grows up to be a deadly assassin. Now Ron if you'll take them back to their cell. Their collars turn off and Wade's throat and foot heal. "Hey! That was uncalled for!"
"We need to figure out a way out of here so we can call in the big guns to destroy everything here." X23 growls. "Look, No one hates being experimented on more than me. Doesn't mean you can STAB A MAN IN THE FO-" X23 punches him in the jaw, dislocating it. X23 sits in the corner as Wade reattaches his jaw. "Guess it's time for softie Wade." Wade walks over and sits down. "Look. If someone has to go down for this, I volunteer. But I have an idea. But, first, I need you to hand me the sonic scrambler and look away. She hands Wade the disc and he secures it in his rectum. "O-kay. That's uncomfortable."
The next day, Dr. Chapman comes by and activates the collars. Wade instantly falls over. "Help! He needs help! His cancer!" The guards scoop Wade up and haul him toward the medical bay. While Dr. Chapman starts to escort X23 through the facility.
Deadpool catches them off guard and takes them both out. Using a remote on one of their hips to deactivate his collar. He then sneaks through and finds the control room. He then extracts the disc and plays the sound over the intercom. X23, who had already put the earbuds in. Stabs Dr. Chapman with her claws. She jumps down and starts smashing everything there. She runs into a room ready to smash more when she sees a little girl huddled in a corner. Unable to move due to the effect of the scrambler. She looks at the chart on the bed, X-Pool. "Everything is going to be okay. I'm going to take you where the mean scientists can't hurt you." She scoops up the girl and runs out.
She finds Deadpool, drooling on the floor and throws him over her shoulder. She gets a message out to the X-Men. In a few moments Emma Frost, Beast, Colossus, and Cyclops arrive and Wade's managed to regain consciousness. "Uh, Laura, what's with the pint sized Souvenir?" Wade asks.
"This is Sarah." Laura answers.
"Still not getting the gist." Wade continues.
"Christ's sake, She's Project X-Pool." Laura replies.
"Really? How long were we in there?" Wade asks, looking closely at the little girl. Sarah giggles and tugs at Wade's mask. "D'aw she likes me!" Wade says laughing himself. "You guys went dark about a couple weeks ago. My guess was you were kept under sedation for most of it." Emma interjects. "It seems like they used some sort of artificial growth accelerator to get her to this age so fast. They were possibly planning to get her skipped straight into adulthood." Beast adds.
"All that's left to do is call S.H.I.E.L.D to round up the scientists and figure out where we send Sarah." Cyclops says pulling out a phone. "I could take her. She is kinda like my daughter after all." Wade says giving his mask to Sarah. "No way in hell am I trusting a child to you. And by that logic I'm just as much her mother." Laura growls. "Well lucky for you, there's a home for mutants who don't have one. How about we take her for a bit while I help you two settle the matter. The two concede. Wade passes her to Emma. "See you later, peanut." Wade waves as they all take off in the jet. "Hey!"
