The Kiss List

Number Twenty Three

I wake up with a pounding headache, my eyes seem to be vibrating in my head. I moan groggily and roll over in my bed, but even that hurts my head. I can't imagine what it's going to be like when I have to open my eyes. The sunlight is probably streaming onto my bed how it usually is. And the only thing I'm thinking is why did I do this?
I turn to the side and pat around in the bed, expecting to find a person there. I know I slept with someone last night, I am remember fuzzy details. I was hanging out with him all night, we were both drunk. I can't place my finger on who he was though. Talking, laughing, kissing. Lots of kissing...
But as I feel around my bed, I realize he's not there. And then I hear my phone buzzing on my night stand. I feel around until I can unplug it and slide to answer it, still not opening my eyes.
"Mmm, hello?" I answer sleepily.
"What the fuck Hope?" The rough voice replies from the other side of the line. "You told me I was the best you'd ever had."
It was Johnny Parker, my first friend arrangement. He wasn't bad, but definitely not the best I'd ever had.
"Johnny, I told you that because I was lonely and the sex was good relative to what I'd had before, which was nothing. I am curious though, who told you this? Was it Myra?" I ask trying to string together a coherent sentence, wake up, and figure out how I was going to deal with him. Johnny was a sophomore year mistake. I'd just graduated high school, and I just wanted a peaceful summer before going to UCLA. I'd thrown a party last night and invited upperclassmen from my high school, Winter Heights, our rivals, Lincoln High and Wilmington Prep.
"Nobody told me Hope." He spat, "Nobody had to tell me."
"What-"
"Your kiss list, Hope. You put me at number 23. Now everyone thinks I'm an awful kisser. Do you know how hard it's gonna be to score a senior year prom date this year?"
Yep... Johnny was a year younger than me.
I was now fully awake. I had taken two Advil, downed a glass of water, and I'm sitting on my bed, dreading cleaning up the party.
"Johnny, what do you mean my kiss list? That's private. It's saved on my phone and no one knows the password!"
"Well it's out. And it's circulating the senior chats, the junior chats, all the chats basically. Even at Lincoln and Wilmington. Everyone who's anyone has seen your kiss list by now Hope."
"What the hell? When did it get sent out?" I ask panicking.
"Three am this morning. You mean you didn't put it out?"
"Why would I put this out? It's humiliating!" I question.
"You're humiliated? I'm humiliated. I'm at the bottom of the list, I'm number 23. I'm behind Simon Byrde. I didn't even know you knew who he was!" Johnny rants.
I look around my picture perfect room. How did I not notice it before? A pink sticky note taped to my computer. Not a calling card or anything, since I have a stack on my desk. But it says 'thx for letting me use ur computer. emailed the list to everyone at the party. check ur printer. ps: thanks for last nite;)'Next to my computer, was my printer, and on my printer was my biggest secret. It was my kiss list.
"Hope? Hope! HOPE!" I put my phone back to my ear.
"Who did this?" I ask.
"You." Johnny replies, "According to the screenshots, you posted it to the senior group chat at 3:23 am this morning. The screenshot of your list was captioned, 'enjoy my kiss list', the chats have been blowing up ever since."
"Johnny, I didn't post this. And you might be number 23, but I've kissed more than 23 guys. At least 10 were worse than you, but I was too drunk to remember their names, or I just never asked." I admit with a cringe, it sounds kinda bad out loud.
"Well if it wasn't you, who posted the list?" Johnny asked with an edge to his voice.
"The guy I slept with last night." I reply, somewhat confidently, I mean it had to have been him.
"Who the fuck was that?" Johnny asks, "I'm gonna kick his ass."
"I don't know," I reply somewhat bashfully, "I can't remember."
"You can't remember anything?" Johnny asks. "Nothing at all."
"Nope."
"Can I ask though, why am I on the bottom of the kiss list?" He asks almost insecurely.
"Last time I kissed you was sophomore year, and it was nothing special Johnny." I reply.
On the other line he hums, and I can tel if he's satisfied with my answer or not.
"Oh and Hope? The top two guys on your kiss list, they're blurred out. Nobody knows who Hope Waynsworth's number one kiss is, but people sure are speculating."
"Thank you Johnny," I say and hang up. I have got some serious damage control to do.
I open up the senior group me, which I'd previously had on do not disturb, and I find 527 text messages. I can't look through them all, so I scroll up to the last 50 to check what people are saying.
Some people are calling me a slut, others are defending me, because in reality 23 is not that many. And at least ten guys from the kiss list are either gloating or pitching major fits. Over compensating with reasons as to why they're so low on my kiss list. Because she doesn't like me or because we had a falling out. Even because I didn't want to have sex with her. God it's crazy what people will say for their reputation, not that I blame them. That list was supposed to be something stupid to look back on when I was older, and now it was something to ruin
me.