Lashton/5sos- I just want it to stop
(One shot)
No Y/N
Contains self harm and suicide attempts/suicide if easily triggered do not read!
I do no in any way, shape or form promote these factors!
Currently taking I'm requests so feel free.
Luke-
Pacing round the knew hotel room like contemplates everything wrong or bad he has ever done in life, quick to come to the conclusion he's never been bad or intentionally hurt anyone. That's when his shoulders slump as he leans against a wall slowly sliding down.
He didn't realise he was crying until the droplets fell onto his super skinny black jeans, not even bothering to wipe them he gets up and walks to his bathroom looking in the mirror,
Luke hated doing that, such a simple yet horrifying thing.
He didn't like seeing all of the visible imperfections like the spots he has littering his forehead and chin, yes it's what most teenagers get but that doesn't mean he has to like them, in fact he hates them, he hates how his eyes don't shine as bright as they used to now they just look lifeless.
Luke hates how there's dark bags under his eyes that not even girls concealer cover anymore because they are that prominent, Luke also hated how people told him he's perfect because he isn't.
He feels like the world is laughing at him when thy complement him like they're lying to him.
Luke hates being ugly.
And when he's on social media he looks for the nasty comments confirming his thoughts as they him he's ugly, a mess and so much more.
Luke barely even notices the bottle of paracetamol in his hands, he was once told it was the worst yet most common painkiller there is because it can just shut down the lungs and kidneys.
So he pops the bottle open counting the little circular pills, filling a cup of water up Luke tips the bottle in his hand pouring 3/4 of the contents in his hand before tipping them in his mouth gulping down mouthfuls of water.
It's done.
He doesn't need to worry anymore.
That is until 7 minutes later ashton walks into their shared room looking into the bathroom as the door was wide open.
"Hey lukey what's up?"the older boy smiles.
"Ash, am I ugly?" His response is barely a whisper.
"No? Why would you ask that? I think you're beautiful Lucas!" The boy laughs but his words are more then a joke.
"Then why do I always feel it? Why do I always feel like I don't want to wake up the next morning? Why do I have this hateful feeling towards myself ashy?" Ashton watches the stream of tears roll down Luke's flushed cheeks.
"I don't know Luke but firstly you are one if the most hottest guys I know I mean look at you wow! And I have the same feeling sometimes but I get up and laugh the day away because we only get one life Luke just the one so don't contemplate living it your lucky to have it! And it's common to feel like that your a teenage boy going through changes wow I sound old but listen to me, you are immensely smart, ridiculously hot and your living the dream lukey we made it!" Ashton is out of breath
" I'm not contemplating anymore ash, the deed it done." Luke's eyelids flutter shut as he becomes dizzy from the pills as Ashton pull him forward shaking the younger boy.
"FUCK OF LUKE THIS ISNT A JOKE, WHAT HAVE YOU TAKEN!? Baby please wake up..." The last words are whispered as Calum Hurd the commotion before running into the room seeing the scene unfold and ringing an ambulance that said they will be there shortly.
Ashton-
"Mikey I just feel like I'm not good enough"a sobbing Ashton mumbles down the phone to one of his best friends.
"ash you know you are iv never met a more talented drummer!" Michael raised his voice slightly.
"Then does everyone tell me you guys don't love me and I'm talentless, they say I don't deserve to be in the band like you guys do!" Ashton has been feeling like this a lot recently and all the twitter hate has start to get him, he's also been receiving prank phone calls from young girls sending death threats and telling him how much they hate him and he should just kill himself, it's been a while since the thought of that but it's itching it's way into his head and slowly consuming him.
"Oh ash you know they do that because they aren't in the position were all in, they are jealous they aren't the drummer or a world wide band! Hell I'm jealous I'm not the drummer of 5sos have you seen him he's hot" Ashton could tell Michael just winked even though they are not together.
"Okay, I think I'm going to go get some sleep, good night Mikey,
Love you! Ashton sighs hanging up after getting an I love you back.
But he couldn't get this feeling out of his head like it was now or never.
So he walked to his balcony and looked at the stars, the ground was calling him, screaming his name.
His phone buzzed from in his hand.
@ilovecalumsbutt:@Ashton5sos god your such a waste of space, play in traffic jump of a building just die already!
And that's all it took, with tears running freely down his face as he hiccups and grabs ahold of the railings.
"Hey Ashton, Mikey told- what are you doing!?"Luke barges into there shared hotel room.
"I'm sorry Luke, I love you and they guys" Ashton jumps.
Ashton would have fell 8 stories but Luke grasped his arm pulling him with all the strength he had in him making him fall on top of him but it was nothing sexual just a mess off crying boys.
"NOT TODAY ASHTON! not today, please don't ever do that again because if you do expect me to come straight after you, and I don't wanna die." Luke clutches so Ashton like a little boy who gets lost in the super market then find his mum.
"I'm sorry Luke, I'm so sorry" ashton just weeps on the younger boy.
AN I'm sorry these Sucked but yeah.....
