Disposition

*******Chapter Seven- It hurts..******

21

Alessia.

I woke up feeling very uneasy, like I had this unsettling in me, can’t really explain it. Oh! I guess I just really needed to pee. Go figure. I’m almost full term now, due in like a few weeks. Umm, the feeling is, I don’t really know how to explain it.  I feel like Jer is being so distant. I mean he barely touches me anymore. I read about this but I didn’t actually think that it would happen to me.  He’s always wanted me when I want him. Is it cos I’m all fat now, stretch marks everywhere. Tch.. This is the part of pregnancy no one seems to tell you. Where is my so-called glow!! I must be getting closer to my due date, I least I hope so. I haven’t had a good poop since all this started. Can’t bend over anymore, cant even sneeze without peeing on myself… the joy of motherhood… I really cannot wait for this phase of my life to be over. I hope Jer will go back to himself and soon. I need him around, where is he nowadays

22

when I need someone to talk to. He must be there too, at least for me.

Jeremy

I haven’t touched her in a while. I haven’t felt her in a while. I haven’t looked into those… those eyes.. I haven’t kissed those lips. Gosh! I miss her sooo much. I know she is hurting, but ever since that call came in. I cant eve touch her anymore. Its, its…. I just don’t know. Why am I this way? I don’t need this; she doesn’t need this right now… I must be there for her… But why cant I? Is he going to reveal himself? I hope not, I don’t know how she will take it. When did I even start to drink? What is happening to me?

“Sir.. Sir…” A woman comes into my view. “Sir, the bar is closed, I’m afraid you’ve got to leave.”

23

“Leave?” How long have I been here? Apparently for about five hours, this needs to stop, but it’s spiraling out of my control.