By Midnight Blood

Chapter Twelve: Life-Breather

Liridia
———————————

I stared into space. My hands were still shaking after my encounter with Trinity. She was terrifying, and I was horrified at myself for looking so weak in front of her. I spooned food into my mouth, tasting nothing but still eating, building strength.

I spotted a swish of blonde hair and I stood up out of my seat, abandoning my food and fleeing the dining area. I hid my wide eyed stare behind a curtain of my raven black hair. I never realised how hair can cast weird shadows on things like the looks of people's faces and postures, turning them into ghosts, wraith-like monsters.

I suck in the feeling of helplessness like a deep breath and hold it. I walk in a seemingly calm trance towards my quarters and narrowly dodge bumping into numerous people rushing for the dining hall.

I hold in my terror until I reach my quarters, wretching into my small cubicle of a bathroom. I held my head above the bucket in shame and vomited everything I just forced myself to eat back up.

I wiped my mouth and leant against the wall, turning and staring into the worried eyes of Nalem. "Are you well? I only came when your friend told me you bolted from the dining hall before she could even say hello." He fussed over me for a minute, assessing my dead eyed glance and sitting beside me on the cold floor. He rested his hand on my shaking palm.

"Why are you here." I croaked, holding my hand over my mouth so he didn't smell the full force of my breath. He frowned slightly in reply. I pushed the bucket away with my foot and coughed.

"I was worried." He finally answered, pushing some of the hair stuck to my forehead with sweat away with gentle fingertips.

"No you weren't. I'm weak and a fool to think I could do this." I whispered almost to myself, but his face hardened.

"You are weak and a fool to think you can't. You will try. You will atone with sweat and blood and the defeated cries of your enemies. You will punish all those who think you, Liridia Obelyn, cannot do it. Show them you can. You've already shown me, so it's time to show them." He spoke to me, his features harder than before, his eyebrows creasing and his words cutting into my heart. Cleaving my mind.

I press my thumb to his forehead and press up, un-creasing his brow. "You'll get lines like the elders before you're middle aged if you keep frowning like that. And where has that speech-giving-life-breathing-hope-sharing Nalem been all this time? He's more intense but I like him better, I believe."

"Where has the linguist in you been? Life-breathing." He imitated me, making me smirk and bat him with a not so shaky hand. I rest my head against the cold wall, closing my eyes and trying to channel the feeling Nalem instilled in me into movement, but I couldn't bring myself to move a muscle.

I can still feel Trinity's eyes watching me, talking to him. That's when I realised he had been silent for a while now. Was this Nalem's doing? Or was he too scared to come out like I was? Either way, I could actually think.

"Let's get down to business. You need training, and a lot of it. So tell me," Nalem begun discussing my imminent training program, "you have talents. I've witnessed them. Let's review; instincts and reflexes. Affinity for knives. Agile. Observant. Do you have prior knowledge of any killing method? Any preferences?"

I swallowed my own spit, my throat crying for a drink. I managed to get out, "Poison. Do you have someone that specialises in poison?"

Nalem turned to me like I'm a stranger and nodded after a moment of contemplation. "Indeed. You know Cal?" My stomach roiled. Fuck. I nodded, holding in another onslaught of the need to vomit. I had emptied everything in that first bout, so I wasn't inclined to find out what else I could throw up.