Mason's Medical

The Name Of The Game

Life's a game, all you have to do is know how to play it.
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Grace found Miranda near the OR board, glaring at the offending item. 'You alright there, Miranda?' She asked as she handed over a mocha latte.

'Look at that board, and then ask if I'm alright.'

'Okay…' Grace did as she was told and frowned when she noticed something, or rather, the lack of something. 'Yesterday?'

'Nope. And it won't be there tomorrow.'

Grace joined her in glaring at the board just as Shepherd came around the corner.

'Ah, Doctor Bailey! You have an extra intern?' Shepherd came to a stop beside them.

'I'm available.' Miranda said immediately.

'And I'm going,' Grace said. 'Catch you later Miranda.' She left without even looking at Shepherd.

Grace knew it shouldn't have bothered her so much that Shepherd was so quick to drop their fledgling friendship when Mark came to Seattle, but it did. She didn't let people in easily and his reaction had hurt her, no matter how unsuprising it was.
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Grace was sat in the observation room. Watching Addie doing the procedure on Meredith's sister. Meredith was at the opposite end of the room, knitting. She had no idea what that was about but Grace was pretty sure someone was either fixing the knitting or swapping it out, because the bit she'd seen Meredith do was nothing like the rest of it.

She sat forward on the seat, her music player going in her ears, following each step, imagining the way Addie would explain everything to George. Imagining the way she would do the same thing. This was one of the ways she kept her skills sharp, mentally if not physically.

This continued for the whole procedure, and at the end Grace was startled by a hand on her arm.

'Fuck's sake!' She jumped about a mile in her seat and glared up at Shepherd who was trying not to laugh. She yanked the headphones out her ears. 'I know you don't like me Shepherd, but I don't need to be put on Preston's case load.'

'Sorry, I did say your name, I didn't think your music was that loud.' Derek said with a smile. Grace rolled her eyes and went to stand. 'Wait, please.'

Grace hesitated at the look on his face and remained seated. 'What?'

Derek sat beside her. 'I wanted to apologise, for…well not for what I did or said, but the way I made you feel. I shouldn't have done that.'

'Fine, whatever. Apology accepted.' Grace stood and started wrapping the wire around her music player.

'Addie said it's getting worse.' Derek's voice stopped her as she turned to leave.

Grace sighed heavily. 'My friends have big mouths.'

'Maybe, are they right, it's happening when you aren't stressed?'

'Yeah,' Grace turned back to him. 'It started not long after Christmas. And no, I didn't have any falls or accidents or anything like that. It's just…got worse.'

Derek sighed as well. 'That's not good news.'

Grace gave a watery laugh and sat back down. 'No. Which probably means there's a fluid build-up on my brain in that area.'

'You know I'm capable of doing the surgery.' Derek said, turning in his seat to face her. 'As a favour to…well, I read up on your case years ago.'

'I know.' Grace smiled softly. 'You know, this operation is the only thing we've ever really argued about, me and him?'

Derek looked surprised at this. 'Really? I didn't realise that.'

'Yeah. When he was here, he said he'd look after me if the worst happened because of it,' Grace said quietly, not really talking to Derek anymore. 'Said he'd take me places and we'd never have to work, because we're both loaded. And he'd do it. He'd give it all up for me, without even thinking, just to make me smile.'

'You're in love with him…' Derek said, drawing her attention again. 'How long?'

Grace chuckled. 'The one night stand that…got me pregnant?' He nodded. 'That was the day I realised, I'd loved him for years, but that was the day I knew it. I wanted to forget and deal with it in the morning. Got a bit more drunk than planned.'

'I never realised.' Derek said looking down into the OR where the scrub nurses were cleaning up. 'Does Addie know?'

'Yeah, yeah she knows. I think, you and Mark were the only ones that didn't.' Grace laughed outright. 'Even your Mum knows!'

Derek laughed as well. 'There's very little my mother doesn't know.' He smiled back at her. 'Why have you never told him?'

'Because he doesn't see me that way,' Grace replied with a sad smile. 'I won't ruin what we have by telling him and…it's why I've always put off the operation.'

'Because you love him?' Derek was clearly confused.

Grace shook her head. 'Because, however small, there is a chance the surgery could kill me. And I don't want to leave him like that. Wondering if it's his fault because he talked me into it.'

'The odds of…of you dying, it's only about two percent.' Derek said with a smile.

'Yeah, I know, but fear, it's not always logical.' Grace chuckled. 'It's the reason we all have our quirks for doing surgeries. Preston has his caps, you've have your phrase, Miranda does a short prayer, I say hi to everyone and introduce them to an unconscious patient.'

'It's reason Addie went around and gave everyone juju last week.' Derek agreed with a chuckle before sighing. 'But now, you're risking losing what little you have. So…the operation, has now becoming your best option.'

'Yeah, I know.' Grace replied, watching the scrub nurses again. 'I know.'