Train of my emotions

PART 1

I sit in this train
The backseat, me only
Sitting quietly
In the backseat, so lonely

Watching time fly
As my life passes by
To keep alive I try, but inside I want to die

My heart starts, and drops
My life starts, and stops
My love starts, and flops
Waiting for the next stop

Stops at each station
Speed in the locomotion
Feeling in the commotion
In the train, of my emotions

At every stop
Enters my feelings
Sitting in different seats
Killing, and healing

Everyone enters
Making changes in my mood
I go from nice and supportive
To distant and rude

My train of thought
The rails to my heart
The station in my soul
All, being torn apart

All aboard!
As the train continues to move
Stuck in the awkwardness
Between me, and my switching mood

Traveling fast
Continuing to speed up
Never slowing down
No sight of a brake touch

Leaning back
Relaxing deeply
Trying to find ways
Away from problems that consume me

Stress in relaxation
Relaxation put to rest
Due to the world of my life
Making the worse of me, its best

The best of me
The least, and the rest
The trash of my life
Soon to clean the remains of a mess

The mess of me
Everything lost, and found
Everything loved is lost
Now the existence in my dissappearance, has no sound

Lost my love
Found it back
Lost myself
With no hope in the faith of getting me back

Revealing the truth
All the times I lied
Life on the outside
While the inside has died

While I'm riding
Leaning in my seat
Something weird, and very strange happens to me

My emotions and feelings
Start to look at me
Connecting their eyes to my ears
To my mind, driving me crazy

I try to look away
But my fear brings them closer
The fear in my visionThe sight taking over

The screams and laughs
The cries in their yells
The pain behind smiles
Hands reaching out for help

Covering my ears
Closing my eyes
Coiled in the corner
Screaming in my tears of cries

The voices get louder
My pain gets deeper
My mind going insane
From fear's constant creeper

I let out one big scream
Cannot maintain my steam
Trapped inside my nightmare
Living in their dream

I continue to scream
Until everything gets silent
I stop screaming
As everyone starts hiding

I was scared of them
Now they are scared of me
A reflection of them
Of what I have came to be

Fearful
Of my fearless
Fearful
Of what I can't forget

Fearless
Of the fearful
Fearless
Of pain so hurtful

I see it in their eyes
I know what I see
Multiple faces
Of what I hate to be

They see it in my eyes
They know what they see
This one face
Of what they hate to be

I wish I was them
They wish they weren't me
The reflective vision
Of what I turned into, and what they can't belive

I take a hard blink
One last look at what went wrong
Then I slowly open my eyes
To notice everything is gone