Unforgettable

Chapter 3

AN: I'm having problems with writing a long chapter because I've been really busy with school -- but I still manage to pull out a few words.... maybe more. :) 

Love, no hate please :)

xx, Aya 

I had no idea where that came from. A tear slipped down my eye and I quickly brushed it off. “Don’t cry, don’t cry!” I tell myself.

 Crying was a sign of weakness for me, I had to learn the hard way that crying doesn’t do you justice, you would still feel like everything’s crumbling into pieces and no ones there to help you. It’s like you see everyone around you breathing and you’re the one drowning but there’s no water.   

It took me a long time to figure out that everything’s never permanent.  that sometimes all you have left is the memories.   

Where was I going? I looked at my watch and it was almost 7. Oh my, God. Alex is going to kill me.    Sure enough, I had twenty missed calls from him and texts.  I U-turned and I looked around trying to figure out where I was and the first sign that I saw said I was passed our City. Did I drive that far?   

An hour later I was driving up our drive way; it was farely huge, our driveway was long and trees surrounding it and by the end theres a fountain in between, the house sitting in the background. Basically, it was a mansion… modernized mansion. Ceiling to floor glass windows, wooden oak exterior and a double french door for the entrance.   

I came around the house to the garage. I pull out the remote to open the garage door — I see Alex standing in the side with a mixed emotion face, a hint of anger, confusion and concern. As soon as I got of the car, he picked me up and swung me around. “Put me down!” I yelled, laughing.   

“I missed you, idiot sister!” He pulled me into a tight hug. 

I pulled him in a tighter hug, “How are you?” It came out as a cough.

We pulled out of our hug and then he smiled, “it was really good, but I got homesick!”  Something tells me he was lying. Twin intuition. He seemed to have just read my mind when he said, “Okay, no. You know how I was supposed to stay for another six months?” He quickly said,   

I caught my breath, I knew where this was going and he didn’t need to say it, he just looked at me. “Mom called me, Zaf.” He stated. “I’m worried about you.”  That was it, “Why is everyone saying that?! There’s nothing wrong with me! I’m perfectly fine!” I argued.   

“Your wrists don’t say otherwise, Zafrina.” With all seriousness in his voice — I’ve never seen him like this, and it scared me a bit.  I felt really guilty that he had to see them— it was really bad, but nobody knew about it. Nobody knew the reason behind it.  

“Don’t you pry on my business!” I snapped and for a moment he looked lost, he sighed. “I’m so mad at you right now, I can’t even talk to you.” 

 Alex left me standing there and I just felt a pang of pain and I couldn’t help but look at my left wrist, they weren’t new but they were deep — which meant most of them were pink coloured scars zigzagging all the way through my arm. I shook my head — no, keep it together. Not today.  

----  

Alex didn’t talk to me the rest of the night, he stayed in his room the whole night - we ate dinner but he barely even acknowledged me and then my sweet mother just had to butt in, “What is wrong with you, two? We’re eating for Christ’s sake.” Alex and I both snapped, she sounded exasperated.

I just shrugged and he looked at me like he was about to say something then quickly looked away.    Like it was the greatest day of my life, my mother suddenly had to pick out this day to ask me, “When was the last time you went to Mrs. Cliffe, honey?” I stopped eating. Alex looked at my mom confused to whom she was talking about. Mrs. Cliffe, was my counsellor—was.

It had been months since the last time I saw her, I hated her. My blood boils when I hear her name and I just looked at my mother with disgust. “Mom, no. Don’t start — you know I don’t like her.”   

I know my mom’s just looking out for me, but I would rather not see that counsellor ever again. “Sweetie, you need help.” She touched my hand.

And like my day couldn’t even get any worse. Alex had to sit there and listen to the conversation for the first time. His face was completely lost, not knowing what to do. “No, mom. I don’t need help. I’m fine.” I reassured her, trying to keep my voice calm.

At least that’s what I tell myself. I’m fine. I’m fine. I tell myself every minute of everyday and I’ll keep saying it until I believe it. 

“Who is Mrs. Cliffe?” Alex asked. Mom looked at me. I shrugged.

“Who. is. Mrs. Cliffe?” Alex asked again, sounding angry now.  

“My counsellor.” I whispered. He looked at mom and then back at me.   

He excused himself and stormed out of the house. I sat there debating whether I should follow him or not.   So I stood up and followed him. I didn’t have to call him to know where he was. I already knew. It was our place to begin with.                                                                         

                                                                                ***  

Alex and I were inseparable, we may rip each other's head all the time but we manage to stay alive and be together all the time. We did everything together, he was my other half and sometimes I feel so bad when I close up and I don't let him in with everything that's going on with me.   

I headed down to the creek where Alex and I used to go all the time, especially when we had problems. I hadn't been here for almost a year as I didn't want to go without Alex, and I just missed him whenever I came here.   

I could spot his car by the time I turned, he was sitting by the hood of his car... blowing a smoke.  Wait, what? Since when had Alex been smoking?  

I parked my car next to him, "When were you going to tell me you smoked?" I yelled at him. 

"When were you going to tell me that you've been having a hard time?" He snapped at me. Touchè. That touched a nerve.  

"Don't change the subject, idiot. Since when have you been smoking?" He just shrugged. I took the cigarette away from him and took it away, "Hey!" He growled.  

I sat next to him staring at the creek, we both stayed silent. He put his hand around me, "I started smoking right about the time you started changing."   

I looked at him, confused. "What do you mean?"  He scoffed, "You're really oblivious to the things around you, sister." He grabbed my hand and asked, with so much intensity in his eyes. "You're my sister and I don't know what I would do without you, so please please don't do anything that will hurt you. And when you're ready to talk about it, I'm here to listen." He said.   

Tears started forming my eyes and I just hugged him, letting my tears fall.     

-----   xx