EMTPY NEST

Memory lane

My life has been very long and sometimes hard other times easy, defining and engraved moments. Through it all Lovers have come and gone, though the few relationships i have had none affected me more then with the two Men that i fell trully and madly in love with. One was my childrens father.

We were together for five and a half years and in that time there were many ups and downs, times that were so perfect and times where we felt like killing each other.

I loved that man so much while we were together and it broke me when he left us. We were both to blame for the seperation but not once did I see it coming.

That man could make my body yearn like nothing else, the pleasure he brought made me burn for him. He lit fire to every part of my heart body and soul, I only had to glance at him and I would just about melt, fucking Basterd!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The other was my first love. We shared many nights through the years, we were never really together. It's hard to figure out what we were to each other but I realised almost from the start that i was just used for sex.

Everything had to be on his terms and that i had to keep our times secret from everyone. I don't regret anything or feel resentment towards him as i know my feelings were genuine, and not once did he lie or pretend that it was more then what it was.

And when he was with me, he made me happy.  He knew my body and how to make me feel alive, he gave me my first sexual release and showed me many new things that I'd never tried before.

I look back at my past and i am forever thankfull to have had both of them in my life for different reasons and for letting me be part of their lives. Though neither relationship lasted I have wonderful memories of those times. It wasn't ideal but it worked for me at the time. Call me a fool but it was what made me happy while it lasted.