The Hurting, the Healing, the Loving. (Camren)

Ch. 1 | I Have Questions

Do you sometimes stand in the bathtub, showering and thinking about everything that ever or never happened? You get way too deep into your thoughts, you start thinking about stuff as soon as you feel the water on your skin and you automatically relax.

Every time I took a shower, my mind started thinking about everything that is happening, will happen or should have happened. This process really helped me to write.

I got inspired and I had so many ideas that I even took my equipment with me so I won't forget that specific lyric or melody.

I don't need a shower to get ideas anymore because as soon as I spend a bit more time in the bathroom than usual, they come anyway. I used to put my laptop over a towel or over the toilet, it may sound funny but that's where „the magic happened".

writing means I have to feel everything but sometimes I'm not ready to write about stuff that I'm not ready to deal with emotionally. It happened during every big situation in my life.

Once I went through a big break up I didn't write about it, I was at home and I didn't write about it for a week Because I wasn't ready to confront those feelings. I wasn't ready to go there.

And the same thing happened with this album, except for six months that I wasn't really able to talk about what I was feeling.

It was just built up like boiling water. It just means I have to feel everything in order to write. If I don't feel something, I can't write about it.

With the help of Bibi Bourelly who wrote Rihanna's ‚Bitch Better Have My Money' and Jesse Shatkin who wrote Sia's ‚Chandelier', ‚I Have Questions' was born.

People ask me if the person the song is about knows that it's about them. Well, I wrote it about one person, but it could be about more than that one person. I hope they know though.

Going through this Breakup left me completely broken. I couldn't write anything but sad songs. It affected every part of my life and there wasn't really anyone I could talk to about it.

Why? Because it was complicated.

We were so close, but then it was like literally a day after and we didn't even know each other anymore.

I was sitting on the floor of my hotel bathroom, writing it over this voice memo chord progression that I had in my head. It just didn't sound what it felt like. It felt like what the songs sound like now.

Before I was like, 'How did we let it all get this far, I don't even know who you are.' I saw the person I initially wrote it about at this thing. I just went into the bathroom. It was like a movie. I was just crying.

I feel like I went through this situation where you're in this relationship or friendship, whatever it may be, and you're just kind of left with all of these questions about why things went wrong.

Life happens and you don't really get the opportunity to really talk it out with that person. Stuff like that happens so I just used this song as an opportunity to be like, „If I had this person right in front of my face, what would I say to them?".

How do I fix it? Can we talk? Can we communicate? Do I wanna fix it? Is it my fault? Do you miss me?

I have questions, questions that may never be answered but I've learned to move on and this album is basically my journey through this hard time in my life.

But what actually happened? Who am I talking about? Well, relax, make yourself comfortable and pay attention because this is going to be a long story.