Pretty Boy In Love

|23| I Know, I Know, I Know

My alarm rings.

Great, another day of school, also known as endless stares as I walk down the hallway and whispers about two completely misguided Instagram posts about me. Wonderful.

My friends have helped a little. Liv is just trying to be cheery Liv, ignoring the real issues and talking about anything that she thinks will avert my attention. Rowan doesn't really know how to comfort me, so she gives all these motivational speeches that often have no relevance to my situation. Cass know that I just want all of this to be over, so she tries to help me continue on with my life by inviting me to go to the movies with her and this girl she's into. I'd rather not be the third wheel.

What makes it worse is I haven't seen Noah in a few days. I'm not sure if he's been avoiding me, he's not been in school, or what? Truthfully, I haven't really tried to make contact with him besides paying extra attention as I am walking down the halls in hopes to see his face. 

I roll around in my bed thinking of nothing and everything all at once. How did this become my life?

Before I know it, half an hour has passed and Rosie's knocking on my door.

I groan, which she takes as me allowing her to come in. She's already dressed, wearing my red hoodie and a nice pair of jeans. Ever since we found out about her pregnancy, she's really toned her look down, opting more for comfort than glam. 

She finally spoke to Kolton about the baby. Mom went with her to his house. She's still pushing for the abortion and Rosie is still leaning towards keeping the baby. Kolton apparently claims he'll support her and their child, but Rosie isn't convinced and I am not either. He's not really the type of guy to settle down so early. His family was extremely shocked and sorry if I am being insensitive, I wish I could've seen it. However, Kolton's mom has given Rosie a lot of support as she was a teen mom as well. 

"You're still not out of bed?" She moves to sit on the edge of my mattress. 

"I don't want to go to school." I pout.

Squirming up my bed, she lies down beside me as I make some room for her. "I know it sucks, Jules, but you can't let others get in the way of your life. Don't let them win."

I narrow my eyes at her. "Are we talking about you or me?"

She frowns, leaning her head against my shoulder.

"If you want to keep it, then keep it, Rosie. We'll figure something out. There are plenty of teen moms who raise great kids and who are great parents."

"I should've listened to you."

She should've, but we can't be stuck in the past. What's done is done and she is not alone. I should've tried harder to keep her away from Kolton, but I know it's not my fault. Just like how it isn't my fault that Cullen raped me or how it isn't my fault that Jacob kissed me. 

Eventually, Rosie leaves for school and I follow after her half an hour later. At least being late to school means I don't have to be judged for my every move as I make my way to my locker. 

There is an assembly today and all the students are sitting in the school gym by the time I arrive. Opening the gym doors, the scene in front of me shocks me. 

On the projector screen is the picture of Jacob and I kissing. 

And Noah is standing at the front of the gym with a microphone, yelling, "What the hell is the matter with you people?"

The principal, who is standing next to him, looks completely flabbergasted. All the teachers are looking at each other or at the picture on the screen, trying to decipher the faces. Oh God, now the staff here is going to know too? I'm going to have to transfer schools.