The Magician

Chapter IV

"I'm seeing someone, and he said he knows you."

There it was. Out in the open. No more secrets now. Not on my part, anyway.

With a wistful look, Asra just nodded.

"I know," he said. "I've been waiting for you to tell me. Who is he?"

"His name is Julian. He's a doctor."

He looked at me in stunned silence. Eyes wide, lips parted and everything.

"Ilya?" He murmured, almost to himself.

"No, no. He's called Julian." I corrected.

"Yes, Il-Julian and I go back several years now." He seemed thoughtful, but shortly came back to the present. "So, what did you want to ask?"

I considered for a moment asking about the history between him and Julian, how they knew each other, but given the expression on Asra's face decided against it. Instead, I opted to follow my original plan and simply ask him for ideas on how best to surprise Julian with some kind of declaration of fondness. His response was unexpectedly calculated, as if he knew more than he was letting on.

"I think perhaps..." he started slowly. "I think, perhaps, he would be embarrassed if you went out of your way to do something huge for him. I think what he'd prefer would be for you to just be honest about what you want and how you feel."

I nodded, considering his suggestion. Thinking about it now, he was probably right. Julian was a big old flirt, but as soon as the tables were turned and he lost control, he became a flustered, blushing mess. I was lost in thought, grinning girlishly, until Asra cleared his throat softly.

"Was that all you wanted to discuss? Only, I ought to be on my way..."

"Oh! Yes, I-I just wanted your advice I suppose. Another perspective?" I stammered hastily. While I felt we were relatively close, he was still my master and teacher, and I didn't want to hold him up unnecessarily.

With a smile, he wrapped his colourful coat around his lithe figure, and donned his black hat, decorated by a bright feather. Allowing Faust to curl around his shoulder, he turned back to me.

"As I said, I'm not certain how long I'll be gone. But you'll be fine here won't you?" It seemed more a reassurance than a question. "I'll be back before you know it."

He winked cheekily, and headed off into the early afternoon light. I leaned against the doorframe, watching him walk into the melee of town, and then eventually disappear, blending with the crowd. For a while, I continued to stand there, thinking more about what he'd said. I so very much wanted to know how he and Julian knew each other, and why Asra had referred to him with a different name. Perhaps I'd ask him when he returned.

Deciding I should make myself somewhat more presentable to meet Julian, I made my way back upstairs to freshen up. The whole time, I couldn't stop thinking about what he would say in response to me taking control and telling him exactly how I felt. While I was still ridiculously excited at the prospect of some sort of label for what we had, I still felt a horrible twinge of anxiety in my stomach. What if he had changed his mind? Pushing all thoughts of negativity aside, I stood and set off to my usual meeting spot with Julian.

—

As I expected, Julian appeared from the alleyway, which, presumably, lead to where he lived. He smiled warmly, as always, and took my hand in his. We walked, mostly, in comfortable silence until we reached a small, sheltered bay by the docks. We sat on the sand and stared at the water, my head on his shoulder, for quite some time before I spoke up.

"Julian I...I wanted to talk to you, actually." I began awkwardly. My heart was fluttering uncomfortably, and my hands were shaking, and I just knew the nerves would have shown in the crack of my voice. 

"I have also been thinking lately, my love. But you go ahead first, tell me what troubles you." He spoke eloquently, and I hoped that he had been thinking along the same lines as me. 

"Well...we've been spending a lot of time together recently haven't we? And we have a lot of fun, right? Or at least, I know I do. And now, the more I see you, the more I know how strongly I feel about you. I think I...I think I love you, Julian. And I was hoping, I suppose, that you feel at least a bit the same. So that perhaps, just maybe, we could be something for real. A proper relationship, I guess." I spoke the last part of my garbled ramble almost as a question, before, stupidly, opting to reinforce my point again. "I really do think I love you." 

Julian stared at me in what I assume was stunned silence, a hot, red flush rising in his cheeks. His eyes shifted, and he looked down, toying with a button on his white shirt. 

"I don't know what to say. Only, as I said, I, too, have been thinking about this. I have something to say as well."