Unexpected

Chapter 8

Lost.

Absolutely, completely, and terribly lost.

This is exactly how I'm feeling right now.

Have you, ever, tried defining life?
Maybe the definition of life for you is full of contentment and happiness, where you occassionally might have felt frustrated while constantly fighting with obstacles thrown at you, or you might have remained strong throughout the day and wasted your precious tears silently by nightfall, secretly hoping that the topsy-turvy phase would get better by the next day, when the first ray of golden scintillating sunlight, bright with dreams would arrive.

But what if the nightfall decides to stay forever?

This paramount nightfall with all its quintessential tenebrosity has gulped down all the cheerfulness and expectations from my miserably inadequate life.

Here I am, now.

Staring blankly towards the brightly lit starry dark sky, my mind fully disorientated.

Even the starry sky seemed to laugh at my bizarre, poignant situation, contemptuously.

On the day of my twentieth birthday, which was supposed to be special, a complete joyous occasion together with my best friend and my mother, only people whom I love unconditionally, turned to a terrific catastrophe.

I don't know whether I can ever, erase those utterly gruesome images of Ma, getting assassinated in front of my own eyes.

Fate just didn't stop being vicious.

To make things insurmountable, the murderer turned out to be my psychopath father, who, apparently is not my biological father.

And that information I got to know just a few minutes ago.

My mother never mentioned about a stepfather before.

Not a single word.

My mind suddenly wandered to a distant childhood memory.

Twelve years ago:

Yummy chocolates.

Oh my God there were so many of those delicious looking chocolates making my mouth water!

I want one. Badly.

" Ma!
Will you please buy me one of those," I pleaded, looking at her with puppy dog eyes.

" No. Today you didn't finish your homework. You don't deserve one." She was stern.

" Please Ma only one?
I promise I will complete each and every homework, believe me."

God, please grant me the power of smooth persuasion.

" First stop with this whining, and get them checked by me, and then I would consider whether to provide you one, or not."

Stubborn lady.

I really had no other alternative than to obey, quietly.

Slowly, I walked towards my room and banged the door loudly.
That was simply the reflex action due to my annoyance.

" Nina, my sweet baby girl.
Open the door."

Oh no.
Not again.
My subconscious screamed, clearly annoyed now.

" I've already started doing my homework.
Please just go!" I yelled.

" I've brought you something. I'm not here to play the disapproving teacher this time, baby. Open the door."

Still doubtful, I opened the door.

" What now?"

" Here, take this."

As soon as I glanced towards his hands containing the little "gift" for me, I squealed in excitement.

" Oh my God my favourite - "

" Ssshh. Control your excitement.
Your mother is unaware of this," he said.

With a hushed voice I continued ," My favourite chocolates, Papa. Thank you so much I love you!"

And I jumped into his arms and hugged him fiercely.
His gentle laughter filled up my heart with joy.

Present time:

My cheeks were already stained with the salty wet tears flowing freely.

I missed him. My Papa.

He was the best father any girl would dream of.
He was my best companion, and more close to me than my mother.

He was a great teacher. Far better than my mother.

Usually any study session with my Ma always included scoldings and sometimes, little bit of punishments when I used to become restless with all those monotonous subjects.

But my Papa?
His perspectives were entirely dissimilar than those of my mother's.

He used to be the most caring teacher, and understanding.

Whenever I started to show signs of being impatient, we used to sneak out quietly from my home without my Ma getting any whiff of it.

And the amusement I used to experience with him?

Indescribable.

That life, now seems like a random stranger's, whose family used to be so normal without any unnatural disruptions.

Yes, really.
My house was not just a house.
It was my home.

Until that dreadful night when our tranquil life was thoroughly shattered.

Crushed to bits and pieces.