Sweets... {Sweet Pea x reader}

downhill..

⚠️ SELF HARM⚠️, heart break, and drinking. if any of this triggers you, please, do not read. i'll make a (a/n) for the 11 th chapter, explaining what happened if you cant handle it. if any of you are hurting, dealing with anything of this sort, know that im always here. no matter what. you can priv. msg me if you need someone to talk to.

the morning after~~
(y/n) p.o.v.~
oh fuck oh fuck. thats all i can think right now.
"mmm..." i hear sweet pea groan, turning on his side, and wrapping my hips in his large arms. i look at him, with guilt, with worry. "...(y/n?" OH FUCK.

sweet pea p.o.v.~
"...(y/n)?" i say, looking up at her from her chest. "good morning, sweets..." she says. she looks.. upset? "what's bothering you princess?" i can tell she's upset. she isnt looking me in the eye. which is very unlike her. "oh, uhm i... i just dont want you to regret last night. it meant a lot to me, and as you know, it was my first time.. i dont want you to leave, i dont want us to stay friends. i want you to be mine. but if that isn't possible, i don't want you in my life. because it'd be to awkward and painful acting normal with you. so im sorry, but you need to go." she says, now practically sobbing.

(y/n) p.o.v.~
it was all too much. this was too much. he needs to leave. its clear he doesnt feel the same and i was just a one night stand. "wait.. baby what..?" he says, beyond hurt. "dont call me baby, sweet pea. now leave." i got him up and pulled him to the door. "(y/n), stop! you havent even heard what i have to say!" he fumbles out of the door. im standing there, freezing, half naked and about to shut the door. "i dont care what you have to say because i already know. i know you just wanted sex. im sorry, pea. but goodbye."

sweet pea p.o.v.~
what the FUCK just happened?! she didn't even listen to what i had to say! i thought she wanted what i did. but how could that happen if she just kicks me out and doesnt give a shit what i have to say?! this doesnt make sense. i need a fuckin drink.

(y/n) p.o.v.~
i cant i cant i cant. i feel numb. im so stupid. maybe he did want something with me. no no no... he doesnt. i cant lose him. he's the love of my life. i need him. but he's gone. because of me. im so fucking stupid! i cant breathe.. i cant stop crying... i- i need- i need my razor.

sweet pea p.o.v.~
5th drink of the day. its uhhh 11:26? am? okay thats pretty neat. its 5 o'clock somewhere. 6th drink, going down. im having quite the time with marisa. honestly shes pretty chill. "so, sweets, you get rid of (y/n)?" she said with a grin. "(y/n)..? oh, well- WAIT (Y/N)!!" im too drunk. but i dont care. i run out of the Wyrm. i dont care if she doenst wanna see me. but i need her. i need to tell her that i love her. something was telling me something wasnt right. i showed up to her place. her door was unlocked. very unlike her. i hear water running. a bath? she never takes baths. she hates them.

(y/n) p.o.v.~
*10 minuets earlier*
i run the water. he's gone. he's not coming back. there's no point. he's the only light in this dark world, and i just switched it off. what's the point. we all die someday. its just, im like food. we should get rid of it before the expiration date. thats what im doing. i pick up the cold, shiny razor. i've been clean for a while because of Pea. but now, no one can stop me. i get into the bath. the water is still flowing, almost halfway up. i dont think twice before pulling up my sweatshirt, revealing the nasty thick scars covering my arms. i take the razor, and i start at the top of my wrist. i push down, putting the razor deep in, dragging it up, pulling it out of my arm once i hit my forearm. the blood is pouring out, non stop. i dont regret it. there's nothing to miss anymore. i do the exact same action on my other arm. now, my head is spinning, arms are cold, blood is spilling, and my eyes are drifting. then, i hear someone open my front door.

sweet pea p.o.v.~
i have a sick feeling in my stomach. i slowly approach her bathroom, noticing the water surrounding my feet, and hearing the water still running. my heart starts beating as fast as possible. i start to fill with panic, and i start crying. i rip open the bathroom door, and i completely break inside at what i see in front of me. my babygirl, the love of my life, (y/n) (l/n), bleeding out, about to die. "NO!!!!" i scream, and i cant control the sobs. i run to her side in the bath, and i pull her to my chest. "baby i thought you made a promise... you would never cut..." i whisper to her, dialing 911. her eyes are closed, and her arms are limp in the bath, still bleeding.

(y/n) p.o.v.~
⚫️

sweet pea p.o.v.~
i was trembling now. her blood was all over me, and her skin was turning cold. i held her close to my chest, and i heard a small whimper. thats all i needed to know that she was okay. i started to hear the sirens, thanking god they came this once.

*2 hours later*

sweet pea p.o.v.~
me, and all the rest of the serpents waited hopefully for (y/n). Toni was still sobbing and trembling in Cheryl's arms. Cheryl was trying to stay strong, for Toni, but she couldnt. she started crying as well. i couldnt just sit here. i went up to the desk and asked when we could see (y/n). "im sorry sir, but right now only immediate family is permitted to see the patient." i scoffed, while choking a sob. "okay, well listen up, mr..." i took a second to look at his name tag. "mr.peters. we are her immediate family. we all are family. thats what being a serpent means. (y/n)'s "family" left her when she was a kid. we're all she's had since then. and that girl in that room, thats the love of my life. all of us are scared to death. (y/n) has contributed to the gang more than anyone. she is important to us and keeps us together. so now, get your head out of your ass, and let us see our own!!" i was screaming by then. he looked shocked, but sympathetic. he made a few clicks and clacks on his computer, and eventually let us all visit her. we walked into her room and ...