To Not Let Go

Chapter Fifteen

        "Alrighty, I think that is the last of the boxes of stuff that Matt packed up." Renne practically spat out his name like it was a sour grape. "Let's grab the empty boxes we brought and see what's left of mine to pack up, if anything." Renne walked up to the tack closet of her large horse trailer, grabbing an armful of folded up cardboard boxes, and the roll of tape. 

       Walking back inside the house, Swayde was still quiet, sensing Renne's edginess upon seeing Matt. They hadn't even been here a half hour, and they had already run into him. Sure, it was inevitable and Renne knew that she would have to meet with him regardless to discuss the business, but she was at least hoping that her and Swayde could get settled in first. 

       Not holding the door open for Swayde, causing it to almost slam back in his face, Renne stomped into her house, immediately throwing down the empty boxes to start jerking open every drawer and cupboard door in the kitchen. After slamming shut one of the lower cupboards, Renne shot up. "You know something? It really upsets me that Matt thinks that he can just waltz into my house, throw all my stuff into boxes, and move all of his stuff in here as if he owns the place." 

      "I know Reag-"

       "And then for him to come out there and talk us up like that? As if him and I have been in communication the past two months. Man, he drives me up a wall." Renne resumed her search in the kitchen. After finding all of her belongings had been replaced, including her appliances, Renne continued her search around the house. 

       Next up was her office. Much to her surprise, most of the items there had not been packed up yet. Walking back into the kitchen, Renne grabbed a box and the roll of tape, stomping back into the office to start setting up the box. Swayde followed Renne around like a duckling follows it's mother; he allowed her to rant the entire time, not offering his own comments until she gave him permission.

         "I guarantee whenever we do finally meet up, he is goin' to start in his on his normal crap that he always does." She glanced up at Swayde before grabbing a handful of office supplies from the top drawer of her large oak desk. Pulling open the bottom drawer, she quickly flipped through the files, seeing which ones she would need to take back home with her. "Part of me just wants to fire Matt and get a restraining order so I never have to see him-" Something in the bottom drawer of her desk caught Renne's eye, making her stop what she was doing. Swallowing hard, almost to try to get rid of the emotions that suddenly flooded her, Renne reached down with a shaky hand, pulling out the blue plastic binder.

       "What's that?" Swayde asked, stepping closer to Renne. 

        She couldn't bear to look at him, as an attempt to hide the tears of anger and regret that rose to her eyes. Staring at the words "Matt and Renne" that were outlined with a heart, Renne answered, "This was the wedding binder that I started for Matt and I." Her voice was somber. For some reason, almost like she didn't have control of her own fingers, Renne flipped through page after page, looking at all of the numerous catering options, reception venues, wedding dresses that she had cut out of numerous bridal magazines. Especially now, she realized that in the midst of all of her planning, Swayde was the only one on her mind. It would have been a gorgeous wedding, but only for her and Swayde, never for her and Matt. Seeing the binder now, Renne was even more glad for how God guided her steps, leading her to break up with Matt and get back with Swayde. In fact, ever since she had moved back to Wyoming, Renne had been happier, being with Swayde, than she had ever been in her life.

      "I see." Swayde had no other words. 

      "Oh well." Renne cleared her throat, pasting on a pretend smile. Ripping out a couple pages in the binder, Renne tossed them into the trash. Closing the binder door shut with a slam, Renne looked one more time at the paper on the cover. Peeling it out from behind the plastic cover, Renne crumpled it in her hands, adding it to the other papers in the trash can. "Time to make new memories, and I am so glad that you're the one to make the transition with me." She finally made eye contact with her boyfriend, giving him a serious smile.