Only what the public knows (Suga view)

Jungkook....its my fault.

I fought. I cursed. I am hurt. I am stubborn. We fought. Jungkook had said we should find a replacement for jimin parts. I wasn't ready to let go but i didn't show it. I was drunk. I hit Jungkook. I said untrue things. He hit me back. I never thought that fight would make us what we are today or i would take it back. I punch him and through him to the ground. He got up and did the same. "Hyung stop!" Ugh...those words ring in my head everyday. I didn't stop i yelled at him fought with him kicked him. I didn't want someone else to replace jimin. He huged me trying to stop me but i pushed him off and shoved him to the couch. Its was stupid of me. I should have stop but i was to upset and angry with fear of loseing myself. Before i did anything else....i looked into jungkook eyes. I saw disappointment fear and tears. "Hyung stop...." I could hear it in his voice that he was worn out and fearful of me. I snap and grab the desk chair throwing it to the last thing he had of his mom. Her China bowels. Now that i think on it i......think thats when two hearts broke at the same time. Mine and his. He yelled horrible things at me. I watched the glass shatter into a thousand pieces. "How dare you say we should replace him!" My voice was rough and broken. "If you think that you should just leave!" I walk to what was my studio at the time and sat down at my desk, lost, broken, scared. I worked on a letter till dinner and i came up with the letter to give to him but i didn't see him. He ran away right after that fight. I wish taking everything back was easy....ahh.....shit it still hurts today. Jin decided to take his car and look. Jin shouldn't have.....he had a couple drinks in him. As jin was driving Jungkook step out on....to the road coming out of the studio. Thats when the accident happen. Jungkook told the police it was unknown driver...he didn't want jin to get in trouble. To this day only me,jin and kook know. But i don't remember anything because i was drunk stupid. I think to myself maybe just maybe if i didn't drink Jungkook would still be here today.