In Sickness and Health

20

Stephan is gone all night. 

It's currently three in the morning and I can't sleep. Not without my mate. I feel scared and unprotected without him; that makes me feel weak. I stay mostly hidden in my blankets, shivering despite being bundled up and sweating. 

My stomach aches dully. Thankfully the gashes on my face have healed, leaving nasty looking scars around my jaw and nose, leaving me slightly self-conscious but Stephan reassures me that I'm still handsome.

It frustrates me that my stomach is taking to long to heal - it worries Stephan too. 

I manage to fall asleep after a few hours of watching the news. More people - well, weres, but the humans don't know that - have been mysteriously slaughtered in another riot attack of some sort. I'm paranoid that one day that would be Stephan with the bodies instead of the groups of other werewolves I don't know. It seems as though the graphic images get ingrained into my brain and I'm shivering all over again. I shiver until I fall asleep. It seems like I just blink and it's suddenly six in the morning. It's still dark, considering winter is right around the corner, and it's unnerving to me. I shuffle around, repositioning myself and the blankets because with the blankets it's hot but without them it's cold. It makes my head hurt and I'm absentmindedly scratching at my stomach again, the sweat making it itch. 

Something creaks in the hallway right outside the room. My heart is in my throat as I lay very still, pretending to be asleep. I'm terrified that Stephan's sister will come back to finish the job or one of the werewolf hating humans have come to take me away. I hate that I'm so jumpy; I know I'm weak, physically and mentally. 

I squeeze my eyes shut when someone gently pushes open the door. My mind is jumping all over the place.

"Beau?" I instantly relax and sit up. The light in the hallway illuminates Stephan's face, making him look scary. 

I swallow loudly. "Stephan." 

The whites of his teeth gleam in the light as he smiles at me. "I thought you were asleep." He steps into the room, shutting the door simultaneously. It's very dark and I have to blink a few times to adjust to the darkness. "I'm sorry that I woke you up." 

"I was already awake," I tell him, moving over to make room for him on the bed. He gladly flops down onto the bed with a relieved sigh. I watch him as he buries his face into his pillow and I smile. 

My mate seems to feel me watching him and he glances up at me. "Are you okay mi amour?" A cool hand is placed against my forehead. "You're running a fever," he remarks, "I'll be right back." 

My hands are gripping his arm tight before I even felt then move. "Don't go." I cough awkwardly at how weak that sounded. "Uh - I mean - it's just..." I trail off and quickly remove my hand. Stephan looks at me for a long time before he sits back down. 

His voice is soft but his eyes are searching mine as he asks, "Is everything okay?"

Forcing a smile, I shrug and my words are coming out too fast, "Yeah everything's fine why wouldn't it be fine I just don't want you to go and I sound like a whiny bitch but I didn't like it when you were gone-" 

"Woah, woah, slow down Tony," he soothes, taking my hands in his to stop me. He ducks his head down to catch my eye, voice soft but stern. "I won't go anywhere if you don't want me to. Okay?" I nod which makes him smile. "Good." He kisses my forehead before coaxing me to lay back down. Then he positions himself so he's behind me and I'm facing the wall, an arm slung over my waist and his other arm tucked under my head to serve as a pillow. It's so nice to just lay there with him, though a few hidden fears are sneaking up and grabbing me. The cancer is supposedly gone, but I can guarantee that if it comes back I won't be able to survive it a second time. Yet it seems as though I have more problems with all the weres being viciously murdered and all. I can hear my mate sniff at me gently and my stomach rolls. A puff of air hits my ear as he whispers, "What's wrong beau?" 

My throat's dry. "What makes you ask?" 

He sighs, but not in frustration, I think. "Your scent. I can taste your fear beau." 

I'm blinking back tears at the end of his sentence and I know he can smell the saltiness to them. I don't reply. I can't; there's a lump in my throat that words can't get around. At the tenseness, my stomach flares and I'm sobbing, curling around myself. 

Stephan seems panicked as he picks me up and hoists me into his lap, rocking us together. "What is it baby?" His voice is a soothing tone that rolls through my body. "I can't help you if you don't tell me. I've got you beau." 

Inhaling his scent helps calm me. My body recognizes the scent of mate and starts to relax, but the fear is still there, mingling in the back of my mind. "I love you," I tell him, but I'm not sure if he can understand me. 

It seems that he can because he nuzzles my neck affectionately and tells me he loves me too. 

Stephan's phone is vibrating again but he ignores it and shuts it off before laying us both down to get some much needed sleep. 

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