Emotions

Thoughts

Thoughts, my mind filled to the brim.

Am I thinking clear?

Is everything going the way I want it to be?

If only I knew the answers to the questions I ask myself.

Beginning to doubt my intents.

Could I justify my actions by stating that I am doing this for my benefit?

I know the answer to this question.

No, it doesn't.

Its my way of running.

To hide my guilt from prying eyes.

It gets closer, finding myself pushing people away.

My way of coping.

From what?

Selfish is what I am at the moment.

Others more conflicted than I am.

Yet I play it off as if I am the one conflicted.

Others are in much more pain than they show.

Me, I am juat a bad person.

Bring others down when there need not.

I truly hate me.

The monster I am slowly turning into.

When will I stop?

The answer is yet to be determined.

Hiding behind the steel walls of my mind.

I find solace from the world around me.

Yet my thoughts they will not be still.

Running around they only exist within my mind.

Yet I feel as if they are visible to the people who care.

Which makes them worry but I brush it off as inconsequential.

It doesn't matter to me but it should.

By leaving its my wish it will relieve the tension in my heart and theirs.

For what is to be a long time I say goodbye and hope we come out of it.

These are my thoughts out of billions.