October 15, 2013. One year already with Nicolas; and I couldn't ask for anything better.
I grabe my phone and put on some punk goes pop music before I head out of the house. Taking one last look at myself before I meet up with him, I smile at myself: my long black hair thrown up in a ponytail, icy blue eyes, shortness, and punk/scene style. I put on a pair of black converse and ran downstairs into the first floor and told my mom that I was going to meet up with Nicolas for some smoothies and other delicious treats at this cafe where we had our first date at.
After all that, I finally darted out the door to a nice, cool, October breeze in this nice size town. Not too big but not small either; it had a nice size elementary/ junior/ high school, nice little places to eat such as the cafe I was going to, good population and such. Its a nice place to live at. The cool air felt nice to my sweety palms and over heated body. I put on my ear phones and started down the rode with my music blarring in my ears, softly singing along. The sun shined just as much as I was shining for this perfect day.
After a good 15-20 minutes of walking, I get close too my destination. My stomach starts to knot up and my heart starts to beat in an odd fashion; something it'll do when I get nervous or have a bad feeling growing inside me. I take a seat by a near by bench and turn my music off so I could give myself a breather before I walked in the cafe.
'Calm down, nothing to worry about. Just get up and get in there,' I mumble to myself.
With that, I get up from the bench and walked inside to the cafe where my breath escaped me like I was just punched in the gut and stopped in my tracks.
I saw my worst enemy-Sarah Tubman- give Nicolas a deep kiss on the lips. I watch them giggle and casually talk like they were something. Were they? I couldn't think straight. With teeth and hands clenched, tears threatening to spill, I finally spoke.
"Hey!" I shouted. Thank god there wasnt much people here; but I wouldn't even give a damn.
Sarah and Nicolas shot their attention towards me with wide eyes. I march over to where they were seated and planted my hands on the table. "What the hell is this?" I demanded, but took every ounce of strength to not let my tears show.
"I-I dont know what you're talking ab-about," Nicolas spoke with eyes avoiding mine. "Why here so early?" he added. "You said to be here at 5," I spat, pointing at the clock that was on the wall. I then heard him mumble damn under his breath.
I sighed. "Whats going on? Tell me what I dont know." Sarah got to her feet, hands on hips. Her heels make me wish that her ankles could just snap, while her clothes make me want to throw up(she somehow still looks too slutty even though the weather is cold) and her makeup reminds me of a clown. Out of anyone, why would he use her to cheat on me...?
Sarah said-with no hesitation- that made Nicolas give me eyes of pity. "He's spending time with his girlfriend. Why are you here?" She spat with an acid tone voice. Now I couldn't hold it in any longer. The tears slowly started to slip down my cheeks. "Girlfriend?" I said shaking, staring into someones eyes I dont know anymore.
"I can explain!" Nicolas said innocently.
"What, that you want that whore instead of me. After everything?" I choked out.
"Thats not it!" Now he isn't all sweet. "You know that I'll never do that to you!"
"Yeah, until now, dumbass!" Rage ran through my veins at this point. Not good.
I shouted,"I loved you! I trusted you with everything and anything! But I guess I'm not good enough for you anymore..." after I said that, Sara said something that made me wish I was deth. "Hey, don't blame him for your ugly-self. He nevered really loved you, never did, never will; he just felt bad that you were so alone behind your pathetic camera you're using 24/7. So, why don't you go home you little pathetic, guiable bitch, cry yourself too sleep, and along the way, remember that no one loves you." That played in my head, over and over; like the repeat buttom was stuck.
Then, I punched her square in the face out of nowhere. Perfect. "Gahh, my face you cunt!" She shouted. One of the co-workers seem to have enough, because he came over telling us to either leave and take it somewhere elsewhere or to knock it off. I told him to give me a few minutes then I'd leave.
I stood my ground, looking at Nicolas while he gave Sara some tissues for her now bleeding nose. I finally found my courage and choked out what I wanted to know from the beginning. "H-how long....has this been going on?" I wiped tears away. God, I'm such a baby.
He turned his head too look into my eyes, with fear and worry, then looked down to the ground. "4-5 months," he mumbled. My breath hitched. How didnt I noticed anything? Wow, I'm blind...
It took awhile to process what he had just told me. He noticed and got up and walked right in front of me and tried giving me a hug, but I pushed him away. Hard. "W-wh," but I cut him off. "No, I'm done. You can't fix this. We're over.." Those words killed me.
"Can we talk this through, Alex?" he pleaded. I punded on his chest, tears streaming. "No! You should've thought about this 5 months ago!" I shouted. Then for the heck of it, I picked up Saras smoothie cup that was mostly full and dumped it all over Nicolas and his covered most of his black, shaggy hair.
"I'm leaving now. Sorry for the mess," I told the worker dude. He just nodded. I then ran out of there, telling myself over and over again not to look back. I didn't stop running; the thoughts and questions were to much for me to bare. 'Why did he cheat on me? Was I good enough? What did he have to say to make things better? Whats going to happen next?' I eventually reached my house in no time. I barged in, and told my mom that I was going to stay in my room for the rest of the night. I then ran up to my room, through my hoodie off, kicked my shoes off, and slowly slide down the wall to sit on the floor while I've finally gave up on trying to hold in the tears. I couldn't take it any longer.
Sobs wrecked my body, too many things ran through my head that I could've swore that my head was going to burst. After about an hour has past-though to me it felt like enternity- my sister Haley- who is 11, in 5th grade- came into my room.
"Whats wrong?" she whispered. "G-go away," I stuttered. "Whats wrong?" she said, but started to get impatient. "Go away!" I said nastly. "Jeez, whats your problem? If you keep being a witch, I'll tell mom!" Smart mouth sucker. All I wanted was to be left alone.
"Go away!" I shouted, throwing a picture frame that had me and Nicolas picture in it. It shattered too pieces when it hit the wall, 2 inches from her face. She let out a scream and shock flashed in her eyes. She ran out then. I nevered snapped like that before. Not since...dad left me in this hell hole.
Dammit, this isnt good. I look at myself in my mirror that sat on top of my dresser. Whatever Nicolas did made a huge impact on me. How? Why?
I take a look at the time after I've had enough of looking at myself, slowly becoming a monster, I see that it was 8:30 on a Friday night. Thank god its Friday. I decided that I'm going to go to bed. Today has me physically and emotionally drained.
I strip from my clothes and throw on a pair of boxers and a band shirt before crawling under my black comforter. I texted my best friend Kim that I needed her to come over in the morning when everyone goes out for the day. When that was done, I thought about what just happened, wishing it was all just a dream. No luck.
The last thing I thought to myself was 'How can something so good be so bad and change all the sudden?' I then slipped into an uncomfortable sleep, dreaming the day over and over. Wait, I mean nightmare.
-----------1st chapter done! I hope you like so far! i know it seems different then the discrption, but things will make more sense along the way so keep reading :) like, comment, rate, do whatever. Tomorrow I'll put chapter 2 up!----------
