cornerstone:: lrh

f i v e

another night, yet another strange bar.

this one was called the cornerstone, which had cobblestone throughout the front of the building, along with white siding. around the building was a black, iron fence that one would open and pass through to get to the bar itself. thick, green vines grew along the chimney, which puffed out smoke, notifying me that the heat was on in the place. it was a pretty chilly day in new york city. little cafe tables sat outside, giving guests of the cornerstone a place to sit outdoors, not on this gloomy day though.

i took it upon myself to enter the fence, it creaking as i did so. rain drops fall from the sky onto everything around me, as well as myself. i shut the gate, finishing up my cigarette, yet another bad habit i had unfortunately picked up, putting it out with my boot on the asphalt. throwing the cigarette butt away, i push the forest green door of the cornerstone open. as i enter, i am engulfed by a warm, dry heat, the smell of incense, and "pale blue eyes" by velvet underground playing softly over the stereo.

there are people everywhere. all types of them. the place was pretty packed. i scan the place, noticing little things. the way the red light casts itself on a young girl's face, the way some guy just tried to discreetly spit into a plant, a couple sneaking into the restroom probably to make love, a beautiful woman on the phone yelling, "i told you already, i only have twenty dollars and i want what it's worth!"

wait.

was that-?

no, no it couldn't be. i'm tired of getting my hopes up only to be let down again.

it can't hurt to find out.

i begin to make my way through the place, lightly moving people out of my path, muttering some excuse me's and pardon me's on my way to her. approaching her, i hear her say to whomever on the phone, "no, i don't want that bullshit. i want the good shit. the real shit."

the middle man, i suppose. someone that is providing her with drugs. my victoria didn't do drugs. and she sure as hell didn't speak like that.

the woman, no longer hunched over the payphone, stands up straight and moves the hair from her face. i immediately recognize her, but she beats me to the punch.

"luke?" she asks and hangs up the phone to advance toward me, putting her hands in her pockets.

"violet?" i ask, making sure my eyes weren't playing tricks on me. i wouldn't be surprised at this point.

"hi!" she exclaims, embracing me in a warm hug.

"hey!" i say back.

my thoughts run wild. violet, victoria's older sister, looked just like vic, making this all the more harder for me. she was vic's height and weight and everything and it felt as though i was holding my victoria in my arms again.

but i wasn't.

"what's up? what brings you here?" she inquires.

"well... just here to drink. hang out. what about you?"

"same here."

"are you here alone?" i ask, curious to see if maybe victoria was with her.

"yeah..." she trails off. there's a silence, and i look to immediately break it.

"so how's victoria?"

"um, you know, i don't really know. i haven't seen her for, like, months. but i'm sure she's doing fine."

"yeah... she always knew how to take care of herself."

//

thirteen coronas later and violet and i were speaking together as though victoria hadn't broken my heart over a year ago. while victoria and i were together, violet and i were pretty good friends. we'd hang out sometimes, have deep conversations if need be. we were pretty friendly considering she was only my girlfriend's sister.

"so how's the music been going?" she asks.

"pretty good! uh, the guys and i have played some pretty big gigs recently, actually. you should come to one! our next one's in brooklyn, in a warehouse owned by some guy's dad. he heard about the band and wanted us to play this party he's throwing. supposed to have thousands of people there. we're pretty psyched."

"holy shit! that sounds totally amazing. i'm so happy for you! congrats on all the big shows, and i will so be there."

there's a short silence, and in that silence i try to work up the question. the question i often have to work up. how would she react? would she be angry? would she storm off? would she be disgusted with me? but she knew what happened with vic and i. i thought she might understand.

she was close, well, you couldn't get much closer...

she said, "i'm really not supposed to, but yes, you can call me anything you want."