Nightmares of Insanity || H.S

Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Ana's P.O.V

The noose is slowly tightened around my neck. I can feel every drop of blood slowly oozing out of every straight and jagged line covering my body. My eyes gave out over the empty field, checking to make sure no one will bare witness to my falling. Falling is my strong suit. I can easily fall for things, like myself.

I will fall tonight, thinking of him and only him. The man I only half know. When I see him the insanity pauses for a moment, but I do savor that moment.

My head pounds every second of every day, slowly suffering due to my own carnage. I can feel the tears in the back of my eyes that never do escape. No part of my mind is safe and I know it. I feel sorry for the head that must hold my thoughts day in and day out. I can feel my eyes rolling back and forth from the raw pain caused by the body they belong to.

Sleep hasn't been felt in days, nor has peace of mind. I can no longer see the man that protects my mind. He's made no appearance to stop this from happening. No trying speech to cease the blood and carnage swimming through my mind at the second.

I wish to kick the stool out of under my bruised and blistered feet before I bleed out. I do deserve to be in pain when I die. I've caused too much pain to not end in it. My eyes droop in sadness and pain. I can only pray for my splitting headache to physically split my own head.

I go to push the stool out of under me when I think of him once again. Each time I think of him not being here to stop me, I stop. Maybe it's because I wish to give him one last chance, for him not to fail himself.

Slowly, I shake the burning thought of my protecter away and begin to move my feet. Before I know it, my neck is awkwardly angled, and my thoughts have all but ceased. My body continues to bleed, but had stopped inhaling oxygen. So why haven't my thoughts left me?

Nothing goes as planned.

I swing back and forth like a tire swing for what seems like ages before he appears in front of my lifeless and thought filled body.

"What the fuck Ana," he screams at my swinging corpse. Tears stream down his face as he balls up his fist. "You're a fucking failure, and you've made me one as well. What am I supposed to do now. You weren't supposed to give up on me, we were supposed to learn how to be happy together. I don't know how to be happy without you by my side." The vein in his neck sticks out as he screams at my body. That body is no longer me, I am only thought and I wish to know how to rid myself of this.

A strange man, whom I can't remember the name of, walks behind my protecter. My protecter has fallen down on his knees in front of my body, screaming out his pain and sorrow.

I no longer have the ability to scream out to him. I want to save him from the literal knife that comes to his back but I cannot. I watch helpless as the knife tips through my protecter's skin, spreading his precious blood everywhere. My no longer beating heart aches as he cries out in pain, falling to the ground. Why would anyone do this to him. Why would I do this to him? I am no angel, but a devil who has failed in saving my only light in this world.

"You've done this," the man hisses at my corpse, but his voice fills my mind. You've done this, it echoes throughout me until I wish to scream out with my dead lungs.

"Ana wake up," a voice screams. "Ana please, wake up."

My eyes jolt open, seeing my protecter once again breathing in front of me. I wrap my arms around Harry's neck, holding him tightly to me.

"My nightmares keep getting worse Harry," I whimper. This was the worst one yet.

"We'll find a way to fix it, I swear. Do you want to talk about it?" I nod slowly and starts to get out of the bed. I grab his arm before he can get too far.

"I'm just getting you some water love, I'll be right back I promise." A minute or two pass before he comes back to me with a full glass of water. "Thank you Harry," I gush after taking a large gulp.

Before Harry can say anything I cut him off. "I can't lose you Harry." I look down at the small amount of space between us. Harry follows my line of sight and pulls me closer to him.

"You're never going to lose me." He can't promise that, but I almost want him too. "What if you get tired of me," I whisper.

"Ana you know that could never happen. You're the greatest thing that could ever happen to me, you're my life. Sure, we both might be quite screwed up in the head but that's what makes us good together. We keep each other sane. I care about you so much." My heart flutters, and my skin gently burns with every touch he gives my battered body. He still finds me beautiful like this and it amazes me.

**

"And he stabbed you in the back harshly, and I couldn't do anything. He told me that I had done this. I can't lose you Harry, seeing that was a deeper level of my personal hell than I ever thought existed." I was almost in tears by the end of reliving my nightmare, but Harry was already silently crying.

"You're never killing yourself, especially while I'm here. You have too much to love for and too many people who like you. And I care about you, seeing that happen would kill me Ana. I think that's what he meant.

"I'm so sorry Harry." I sniffle and wipe his wet cheeks slowly. He smiles down at me, placing his lips passionately on mine.

"I'll always be yours," he whispers. "And I'll always be yours Harry." I yawn and Harry lies me down with him.

"Sweet dreams Ana," I hear Harry whisper but I'm too far gone to say anything before I fall asleep in his arms.

** a/n short and bad once again yes but I do hope you enjoyed. Yes, it's called Nightmares of Insanity for a reason, but what do you think will happen because of them? Make sure to comment and vote!

Much love xx

~A.L**