[WHY DO WRITERS WRITE?]
Why do writers write?
Since months ago, my writing is a mess. My words gets all jumbled up. My words are simpler than usual. I get distracted easier than usual. I can't even construct a simple sentence without mistakes. I feel so exhausted whenever I'm typing even though I didn't really typed anything. I think it's a Psychological thing. I'm really out of it these days.
Say, why do you write?
I write because it is the only thing I can express myself into.
But what if you don't feel like expressing yourself anymore? Do you still need to write?
I don't need it, I want it!
Why do you want it, then?
Because...
I'm doing this often.
Asking myself.
Answering my own questions.
You see,
I'm lost right now.
I'm finding my will, reason and want to write. You see, while I was writing this, I stared at the word write. I'm doubtful whether I spelled it correctly or not. I'll doubt even the word?
That's my problem.
Why do I write?
I first attempted to write because I was inspired, I wanted to be like those authors that created a true masterpiece.
I second attempted because my lover inspired me to do so.
I third attempted because...
Because I was desperate to get noticed. I was lonely. I was sad. I want other people to find my worth, worth that I myself couldn't find. I want others to praise me, love me, make me feel I'm special.
I was desperate for fame.
I wrote for fame.
I can't stand myself like that.
I'm disgusted in myself.
So I stopped.
But
I.JUST.CAN'T.BREATHE.WITHOUT.WRITING.ANYTHING.
Duh, what is it? Your oxygen?
Yes bitch iT IS MY OXYGEN.
It is my only way to breathe out what I breathed in
Or rather,
It is my only way to breathe in in order to breathe out.
Because reality suffocates me.
The emptiness in there suffocates me.
