33.
“Waaaaaaaaahhhhhh! Huhuhu!” I hiccupped and took a tissue at pinunasan ang luha ko.
“Are you okay?” Mari eyed me at ang gabundok na tissue sa harapan ko.
“Do I look okay? He can’t remember me. He remembers you, but he can’t remember me. Naalala niya ang lahat, ako lang ang hindi. Waaaaaaaahhhhhhh!” Umatungal na naman ako and then I blow my nose.
“Oh my God! You’re so gross. Bakit ba kasi hindi ka na bumalik sa hospital ulit? Nakalabas na lahat si Carlos pero hindi ka na bumalik. You should help him remember you.”
“What for? Para masabihan ng, Who are you? Do you know how much that hurts? Huhuhuhu.” Oo sinasabi ko sa inyo, masakit talaga. Gusto ko ngang untugin si Oca para lang mabalik ang katinuan niya pero nakakahiya sa Doctor.
“Joanne, maalala ka din niya. Just give him time.”
“Paano kung hindi? What if I will be erase from his memory forever? Kakayanin ko ba Mari? Siguro pag nangyari yun magpapakamatay na lang ako. Huhuhuhu.”
“Seriously? Magpapakamatay ka because of Carlos?”
“Hindi. Stir lang. Sayang ang kagandahan ko.” Totoo yun. Hindi ko naman pinangarap na magpakamatay ng dahil sa lalaki noh. Ano ako sira?
Nagkatinginan kami ni Mari nung may magdoorbell. Nasabi ko na ba na nasa condo ko kami?
Ako na bubukas. Tapos tumayo na siya at naglakad papuntang door. I heard her say hi and she opened the door. Napanganga ako at napatigil ang pagblow ng nose ko when I saw who’s standing in the doorway. Clad in denim and black polo, with a basket of fruits in hand is Oca. He looks so dashing na gusto kong tumakbo sa kanya at amuyin ang scent niya na abot pa hanggang sa inuupuan ko. Gusto kong yumakap sa kanya at ubusin sa singhot lahat ng amoy niya. Oh my God, naglalaway ako sa amoy niya. Is it normal?
“So magtititigan na lang kayo? Excuse us for the mess Carlos, may konting drama lang. Umupo ka.” Umupo si Oca sa sofa sa harap ko. Tapos pumunta si Mari sa akin at kinurot ako para matauhan at sabay kuha ng fresh tissue at inalis ang sangdamakmak na tissue sa harapan ko. I even heard her say gross.
Nakatanga pa din ako kay Oca. I missed him so much. . I wanna cry again.
Nilagay niya sa center table ang basket of fruits at naglaway ulit ako upon seeing the red rambutans. Di ko tuloy alam kung ano ang uunahin ko. Ang rambutan ba o si Oca. Hehehe.
“I’m sorry.” Napatingin ako sa kanya. Nakakaalala na ba siya?
“Wala ka nang amnesia?” Ambilis naman ata mawala, hindi sa ayaw ko. Gusto kong maalala na niya ako.
“I’m sorry for not remembering you. Mari told me about you. About us.” Well, she didn’t tell me that she told you. Amp!
Feeling ko namula ako sa sinabi niya. Yumuko ako. “ You-you don't have to feel obligated just because Mari told you---about---about us. Okay lang naman ako.” I saw him raised his eyebrow. So like Oca. Oh, how I miss his smirk.
“Okay ka na sa lagay na yan?” He looked at the tissue at sa akin and I’m sure nakikita niya ang puffy eyes ko. “You don’t have to cry buckets just because I can’t remember you. Eventually maalala din kita. But I can’t blame you for crying. Nakakahinayang nga na mawala ang isang katulad ko sa buhay mo.” HE then smiled that devilish smile of his. Bigla akong napatingin sa kanya. Damn it! I hate this! Bakit pati pagkamayabang natatandaan niya? Bakit ako nakalimutan niya? I am so jealous.
“What else did Mari told you?” Gusto kong malaman kung ano pa ang pinagt-tsismis ni Mari sa kanya. Tumayo siya at lumipat sa tabi ko. Nagdikit ang braso namin at parang may kuryenteng nanayo ang mga balahibo ko. Shucks! Unconciously kumuha ako ng isang rambutan pero nahirapan ako sa pagbubukas nito kaya kinuha niya sa kamay ko at siya ang nagbukas. Kinikilig tuloy ako.
“Basically she told me about that day we had an accident. She told me that we had a row kaya nangyari yun. Nanggaling daw tayo ng OB. How’s our baby?” I blushed again. Nagiging awkward na ang conversation. At hindi ko napapansin na napaparami na ang kain ko ng rambutan dahil madami na siyang nabalatan. I’m pigging out I know, anong magagawa ko, natatakam ako sa rambutan. At natatakam din ako kay Oca pero sadly, hindi pwedeng siya ang kainin ko. So Mari told him about my pregnancy but edited a lot of info. Maybe she wants me to tell him the other details. Bless Mari.
“The baby is fine.” He looked at me again, yung taimtim na tingin na nakakatunaw kaya nagblush ako lalo. Paano ko sasabihin sa kanya that we didn’t have just a row? That he denied me and that we broke up. Paano ko sasabihin sa kanya ang lahat?
“Thank God. I can’t forgive myself kung may nangyaring masama sa baby at sa’yo. Even if I have amnesia, nararamdaman ko pa din ang link between us . Ang gaan gaan ng loob ko sayo kahit hindi kita naalala. It’s as if we’re kindred spirits.”
“Kindred spirits?”
“Alam mo yun. Kunti na lang soulmates na.” And he grinned. Napangiti ako. Obviously he'd been watching a lot of commercials lately. Kahit may amnesia na siya, di pa rin naalis ang humor niya. Thank God for that.
Then there was silence. Malapit nang maubos ang rambutan. I am sure I'll be sad without it.
“When is our wedding date?”
“ACk!” Nabilaukan ako. Sh!t!
“Water?” Habang hinihimas himas niya ang likod ko.
“No thank you. Okay lang ako. Nabigla lang ako.” Cough cough.
“Bakit ka mabibigla? Aren’t we supposed to be planning our wedding now? Don’t tell me na hindi tayo magpapakasal!” Tumaas na din ang boses niya at tumayo na siya. Yumuko lang ako. I should be mad at him for bringing that up kasi yun ang dahilan kung bakit kami naaksidente but how could I be mad kung hindi niya alam kung ano ang nangyayari. Kung hindi niya alam kung bakit ako galit sa kanya in the first place.
“You are having our baby and yet, hindi tayo magpapakasal? Didn’t I propose to you? It’s very unlikely for me to have impregnated you and not marry you. Hindi ko ugaling mambuntis ng isang babae na wala naman akong planong seryosohin! I am not that irresponsible with my actions. I’m quite sure that binuntis kita because I’m dead serious with you.” I’m out of words. With his declaration, with his outrage and his conviction.
“Joanne,” he squatted in front of me para magkalevel na ang mukha namin. He then took my hand and looked at my eyes. “I’m sorry if I didn’t propose to you. I can’t remember. But gusto kong itama ang lahat.” HE then kneeled in front of me habang hawak pa rin ang kamy ko. “Will you marry me?” I should have been thrilled because OCa is proposing to me. But why is it that feeling ko something is wrong.
“Oca, you don’t have…”.but he cut me off. to marry me.
“I know this is not the most romantic place to propose with you and I don’t have a ring. But we could have an engagement party and we could shop for a ring later. But would you give me the pleasure of being a good father to our child?”
“Of course, you can…” pero again hindi niya ako pinatapos. Ngumiti na lang siya and he hugged me.
“Thank you Joanne. I swear you wouldn’t regret marrying me. Oh my God! And now, let’s go shop for that ring.” Tapos hinatak niya ako palabas ng condo ko. I saw Mari waved and smiled at us. I’m sure she heard everything. Tama ba akong mas persuasive ngayon ang bagong Oca kaysa sa dating OCa na nakilala ko?
