My parents always told me that the world is a beautiful place, but I wouldn't know. I was born blind, full blackout not just partially. I got Amber when I started school. My parents took me to the place where I could play with the seeing eye dogs and pick one out. Amber's fur was soft and short, she had a rough tongue. She was really gentle and careful with me, more so than the others. She played with me, and let me get on her wide back. I was small back then, of course, so I wasn't too much of a burden. I could hear her deep and heavy panting when we ran around together and I ended up picking her. My parents told me that she was a Pitbull and that they were anxious for me because of it, but I didn't care. To me she was just Amber; sweet, gentle, careful Amber.
My big sister played tag with Amber and I when she wasn't doing homework and sometimes her friends would join in. Her friends were really nice, I liked them.
~
I started living with my sister (she was twenty-four and I was ten) when my parents died watching the news. My sister said that she and I were lucky, I was blind and she never left her apartment. She read the newspaper to get the news.
Most of her friends started living the same way when they heard about the disease that was apparently going around. They used text and call (not facetime) to communicate, Mason sent us food from his pantry by drone, sometimes he would send candy for me too. He always remembered dog food for Amber, sometimes he sent big pieces of meat for her; I liked Mason.
Amber's friend Veronica was an engineer and was designing robots that did things for them and could work by themselves. I thought she was a genius for thinking of it.
When she sent my sister a message telling her that one of her robots had successfully gotten her groceries from the Albertsons' nearby. My sister made spaghetti and meatballs and she let me have a little of what she said was wine. I didn't like it very much, she laughed when I scrunched up my face. It tasted like really bitter grape juice and after I swallowed my throat burned and my head hurt, I decided to stick to milk. We listened to music and danced, even Amber joined in.
Veronica made more of her robots and sent us one, we used it once a week; it was really loud. It was really chunky and had lots of corners and hooks, to hold the bags I guessed. I didn't like it, but it got us food, so I tolerated it. Mason still sent us candy, dog food, and dog treats.
~
A few years later I fell off of the couch dancing to Fall Out Boy (that's who my sister said it was anyway) and scraped my knee. My sister was working in her room, but Amber licked my knee and brought me some tissues before she went and got her. Alex grabbed a box, she said it was her first aid kit. She dabbed something on my knee that made it hurt a lot then I felt her put a band-aid with what felt like gel on it over my knee and helped me up. She told me, "You need to be more careful Jason, no jumping on the couch, okay?" I told her okay and I heard a snap then her walking away. I heard a lot of thuds, then a door snapping shut. Fall Out Boy was still playing, so I resumed my dancing with Amber.
That night, Alex didn't come back out of her room. When I went to check on her, I tripped over her unresponsive body, I bent down and shook it violently and screamed for her to wake up, but nothing worked. Amber helped me find my a big bowl and fill it with water. Then she guided me back to Alex's body and I dumped the cold water over her, the splash and the dull thudding of water droplets hitting the carpet was the only thing I heard for the next minute that I had stayed silent.
I dropped the bowl and heard it shatter, I started sobbing, I felt the tears stream down my cheeks, I tasted the salt when the tears trickled into my open, screaming mouth. I fell down to my knees and felt the shards of the broken bowl stab into my skin, but I didn't care. I was too focused on losing the person who had cared for me for years.
I was alone and nobody could do anything about it.
