[C] Crush » Euiwoong

thirhty. (end)

[Herin POV]

"yah why are you crying?"

"omo, Herin are you hurt?"

Suhee quickly come to me and check me out if I have any wound. She keep nagging me told that I should be more becareful but I feel like i'm in another world. The world that only have me and Euiwoong. I keep crying while hold his hand tightly. I dont care about others that are looking at me.

"if you keep crying like this, I will go"

Euiwong was about to leave me with Suhee and at that time, I like a crazy person begging him to not leave me. Other people might think that Euiwoong dumped me since im crying and beg him. I am sure that my make up was all smudge.

"NO!"

"Please, dont leave me again. It was really hard for me. I keep thinking about you and I feel really hurt when you avoid me. Do you know that? I also keep looking at our picture and crying like a crazy person. I really want you to stay by my side."

Ah, I really sound like he dump me. Why I keep doing something embrassing? Shoot, there are also many people that watching us! Wait, Euiwoong is pretty famous and what if someone record me and post it online. This suck. His fan will find me and kill me.

"hey"

"huh"

"how about we go and talk at somewhere else? there are some people that started to record us"

Euiwoong whisper to my ear and trying to help me to get up. I dont know what my problem but I cant stand up. My head feel so heavy. I feel so embrassing that I didnt want to see other people. What will happen to me if they record my face? 

Suddenly Euiwoong put the caps that he wear to me.

"dont worry, I will make sure they didnt see your face"

Euiwoong held my hand and help me to walk. What make my flutter is he also cover my face with his hand. We are so closed to each other that I can smell his scent. He smell so damn good, I want to cry! I also feel protected and I want to scream out loud.

****

After a long walk, Euiwoong stopped.

"hey, no one is here"

Its true, no one here. Somehow I feel safe. I face him and he did the same. This is so fucking akward. The only sound that I can hear is from my runny nose. After a long time of silence, Euiwoong finally say something.

"Herin"

"e-eo"

"im sorry if I hurt you. I did it on purpose, so just move on. Can you please promise me that you will naver have a feeling for me?"

"how can I do that? Hey do you have any idea for how long and how much that I love you?"

Again I feel like I want to cry.

"hey you shouldnt have a feeling for me. We are a bestfriend after all"

"so do you mean it was my fault?!"

Euiwoong looks mad and he sigh a lot. While me crying like an idiot again. I really want him to hug and comfort me but yeah it will never happen.

"I like you too but I think its wrong. you know that I want to be an idol right. I cant be with you, I didnt want you to hurt because of my fan and also because of me again. I didnt want to hurt you more because I feel the same thing when I see you crying. so can you promise me to stop crying and stop loving me?"

So this how you feel when someone rejected you. 

"ah I hate it so much"

"hey what you hate?"

"I already said to you that I hate your dream to became an idol! its suck and terrible!"

Im so loud, I shouldnt have to yell at him arghh.

"Herin Im sorry. I wil leave now and I hope we will not run to each other again"

"fuck how come when we live in the same neighbourhood, study at same school and even in the same class?!"

"just pretend that we never know each other from the start. I will ignore and avoid you"

He leave me. I just watch him leaving me, ah today is a worst day ever. I walk to home and at the same time I crying like a crazy. I cant see road clearly because of my teary eyes and I also cant breath like normal because of my runny nose. Ughh I must look like a stupid.

I stopped at the park nearby my house and keep crying. I dont how to stop crying. I must have a lot of water in my body so thats why I cant stop crying. I must drink a little from now on.

As I was crying someone tapped my shoulder and give a can of cola.

"Suhee?"

"hajima, yah I will be with you dont worry. stop crying, you have me as your bestfriend and I will always support and comfort you like what you did to me even you always deny that you didnt comfort me"

That time, I was really grateful that I have a friend like Suhee. She followed me and she was nearby when Euiwoong and I arguing. Arhh I really hope this day will never happen again to me. Today is suck. I feel like I dont want to have a feeling toward guys anymore, its really hurt. Why people said love is so beautiful, its so ugly to me.

****

A few week passed, Euiwoong really avoid me. When Suhee talk to him, he also ignored her just like how he did to me. I think he really didnt want to get include with me. I cant live like this, I cant stop thinking about him so thats why I decided to move with my mom. We will move to Canada and live with dad. I want to forget all the thing that happen when I was in Korea and start a new life in Canada. Im sorry Euiwoong, I will leave you and forget about you. Bye my first love.

end.