ᴡᴏʀᴛʜʟᴇꜱꜱ; ᴍ.ʏɢ. 🚬

af·fec·tion

af·fec·tion

/əˈfekSH(ə)n/

noun

a gentle feeling of fondness or liking.

____

it has been a few days since i had received the mysterious black feline from my mysterious lifesaver.

life has been more tolerable with some company around the house. i definitely didn't feel as lonely as before. it felt comforting to have a black purring ball curled up on my lap while i read the hours away.

but more importantly, it felt foreign.

being a person who hasn't felt true affection in over a decade. it felt weird and more importantly i felt, as if, i didn't deserve this newfound friendship.

it was like an unspoken bond between us.

i would give this kitten my undying loyalty and affection, and in return, it would help heal my emotional wounds from the past.

her lime green eyes were so beautiful and hypnotising. every time i stared at her, it made me want to drop everything i was doing just to make her happy; i didn't mind though.

today was just like any ordinary day. i was fiddling with the kittens fur as i proceeded to turn a page in my current novel i was reading.

my manager found out about my excessive exercising outside of the normal workout and now keeps a closer eye on me. which, i guess is him just looking after me in long run.

in a way, he is kind of like me; it's difficult for him too display his emotions. it's one of the very few things we have in common. it was nice to have something to bond over for once, we probably would be more alike if we knew more about each other's past.

he knew nothing about mine,

and i knew nothing about his.

and we both were perfectly content with that.

some would say it's because our relationship is strictly professional, but i know that is simply not the case in some situations.

he'd always would ask if i missed my family at all to see if i wanted to visit them. of course, i said no because i didn't have any family to go see besides my grandmother; she doesn't even remember me since she has alzheimers and couldn't remember me as a person.

i couldn't blame that on her though. with age, comes impotence. just like my mother, she was very wise and admirable.

i often times would wish that my mother didn't go off the rails. maybe that would change who i would be today.

maybe i still would be bubbly and mirthful and not have this restive and troubled personality.

some traits just run in the family, i guess.

others not so much.

______

my overly sensitive teenage emotions are taking over :')

~A