The Queen in Hell

Putting Back the Pieces

I stare at the mirror in despair..today was going to be the official funeral, the precinct who had found out he was dead when his body wound up at their door had buried him already by my mother as was requested by a letter left with the body.. a letter they thought I wrote.

But they kept insisting that we do a proper send off, for the community and now, of course I had to go and suffer again and again. I wipe the tear from my eyes as I stare at myself in the mirror.

They had bought my story that I had been held captive for a few years in a dark empty space where I received food and nothing else to keep me alive. I told them I ended up in my apartment and that was it, like it never happened. Of course they were investigating but with no leads and no addresses of any sort they left it to the fact that it had to do with my father and a case he might have been working. It only made sense to them that he died and I was released, which to me makes no sense...

I take a deep breath and put on my black dangly earrings. It was going to be fine, I just had to get through today and I would be fine. I smooth over my black cocktail dress and bend down to put my pumps on.

At least getting a new phone wasn't a problem, but work is... they filled my spot in the years I was gone and apparently the firm can't take another person...plus they want someone more experienced, but fine...it's fine.

I shake my head to clear my stressed thoughts and just relax. Today wasn't supposed to be upsetting, stressed or mad today is supposed to be a memorial, a remembrance.

I was happy when I came to see how many people loved and cared for him. Each one knew him for his unique character and his brave self. He died for me, i can accept that now, but what I can't accept is that he died for nothing!

And I won't forget, and I can't forgive, that despite everything they left me here alone and sad..

That he left me here alone.

And that's why this sadness is pure rage.