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dear q,

i could hardly right this without crying. i want you to know you're still my everything. i told you i'd never cheat and i didn't. i told you i wouldn't cheat. i promised you. and i didn't. i couldn't even look at another guy without thinking of how good you are to me, and how you made me smile, because nobody could compare to you. you were perfect to me, and all i needed.

you're still all i need. and i hurt everyday because i need you.

i go to sleep with you in my head, i dream of us together, and i wake up with the sad realization that we aren't. and i just feel like you don't want to be together anymore. and that just really sucks thinking that everything we had was a lie. i wish more than ever that it was real.

and now all i have left of you are the memories, both good and bad but wow do i still wish i could run my fingers through your hair. you always loved that.

                             love (or don't. whichever you prefer),

                             me.

i've been having a hard time trying to tell you what's in my head but here it is. you might read this, you might not. i'll probably never get the guts to show you anything i write, but if you ever do see this, please let me know you did. please let me know i'm not talking to myself here and that youre actually listening.

you always said you wanted to read something i wrote.

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